My BF Threatened To Breakup With Me. What Should I Do?
Me (19F) and my boyfriend (19M) got into a huge fight recently and almost broke up and now I don't know what to do. We have been together a little over a year and a half and there have been some bumps, but I truly do love him. Recently, I started a new job and there is a group of coworkers who hang out sometimes. It's a mix of girls and guys, some single and some in relationships. They asked me if I wanted to grab food with them after work, I declined because I wanted to ask my boyfriend about it. We discussed it when I got home and he said it would be ok if I went sometimes. A few days later, they asked again, I texted him to ask and he said it was fine so I accepted. Dinner ran over the time I told him and I forgot to text him about it. By the end of the meal he was messaging me angry. I got home, he was asleep. When we talked about it the following day, he sorta flipped out about there being guys there and said that I basically cheated on him. Lots of accusations were thrown around and we discussed separating due to differences. Ultimately, it was decided that we would stay together, but i could not hang out with this group anymore, or any guys. This is a recurring problem due to his lingering control issues after being cheated on by his ex. Several incidents like this have happened. I was at a concert with my female friend and he got angry with him for not texting him and was worried that I cheated on him. I ended up crying in the bathroom of the arena due to his angry messages. I am worried that this will continue to happen no matter if there were guys present or not. Due to situations like this (and life in general), I have drifted from a lot of my friends and was excited for the opportunity to make new friends at work and I really enjoyed hanging out with them and was very excited at the prospect of being friends with them. Despite all this, we have had amazing times together and I would feel lost without him. Since this has happened, I've been struggling about what to do. I just can't help but feel different. I wonder what my life would be like if I didnt have to get permission to do these things. I could hang out with whoever, whenever. I could go to concerts. I could stay out late. I could live my college years however I want. I could have my own house and space. I have also found myself being attracted to another person since the fight, however I can't tell if its surface level yearning due to my uncertainties or something else. I do really love him and part of me wants to be with him forever, but part of me is also uncertain. We have lived so much life together, i dont know what it'd be like without him. He helped me out of a bad situattion with my mom and I moved directly in with him. Hes so sweet and caring in everyday life and he helps me with so much both around the house and emotionally. I always have so much fun with him. How should I handle the situation?