Need a reality check on my drop year plan for IIM Jammu
I am thinking of taking drop I just feel I am not ready for college also koi le bhi nhi rha mujhe just filled the form i want to take drop and prepare well i failed in I'm physics and chem in cbse got 21 in both giving nios from arts just wanna pass toc 85 and 86 eng and phe I am scoring decent like 100+ in mocks also I love study but last two years have made my relationship with the study toxic and I just feel I didn't get the chance to study what I love and I just want to study what I love and give it a chance to live that What would be your advice lim j fits my all criteria interest, city I want, crowd I want I am trying to talk to my parents ki ek saal dedo I will not tell them about iim j plan as they tell everyone I am excusing cuet Fhir uske baad vo jo bolenge vo krungi Also last 2 years were really tough almost my family went bankrupt and homeless (not me trauma dumping) so i failed many times in 11 and 12 I know padhne wale bache khi bhi padh lete hai but i couldn't The toxic and unstable enviornment+ all people and police coming to house+ plus parents fighting and relatives taunts+ humiliation+ dealing with narcissist person ended in breakup broke me I am sorry I couldn't do best but college has been my dream since childhood The only way I can get myself out of this mess Also I didn't wanted to take pcm but I did because my mom always compares me to this person who scored 90 while I scored 89.2 in 10 so I wanted to prove myself and wanted her validation so I chose pcm also worst decision from my side i am sorry I couldn't drop out also because my parents didn't allowed me to they also forced me to take pcmb fully but glad I didn't I just want to move on and enjoy quant reasoning and eng study something that I enjoy and have interest in I have research a lot about it and thought a lot about it iim jammu and program allines with me fully Now all I need is time effort and hardwork I know I can do it but also I don't want to take rational decision so someone with fully function brain right now please help me guide me