How can I help my husband with unmedicated ADHD without turning into a glorified assistant?
Hello all,
I (29F) am married to a wonderful man (29M) who has unmedicated ADHD. He is the kindest soul and works hard, but his ADHD has been a tough thing to navigate. The ADHD symptom that manifests the most strongly is the forgetfulness, and it’s really the only ADHD symptom that is a pain point for us. I have to remind him of things over and over again and then when he forgets I find myself getting frustrated which I feel does not help him.
For example, today as he was walking the door I reminded him to get the stroller out the back of the truck before he left, which he responded to saying he would remember. The truck was 5 meters from the door and he still forgot and drove away.
It is definitely not weaponized incompetence, as a side note. He just genuinely forgets, and he always is very apologetic
I am wondering how I can help him, without turning into a glorified assistant. The whole “if I don’t remind him OR if I don’t do it myself nothing gets done” just doesn’t feel like a healthy dynamic to have in a marriage.
Any advice as to how to help him with this particular ADHD issue?
Thanks!