M38 suche neue Menschen 😄

Hey, suche neue Freunde um meinen Kreis zu erweitern.

Raum FFM.

Bin ziemlich aktiv unterwegs, sei es Bouldern, Fitness, Radfahren oder auch Kino bzw Essen.

Relativ offen für viele Interessensgebiete. Ich selbst bin nerdy drauf, von Animes bis zu Science und Fantasy.

Lieber Bars als Clubs !

Erwarte coole Unternehmungen und gute Gespräche.

Schreibt mir ne pn für weitere Infos ~

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u/Dyzzl2506 — 3 days ago

Old memories and unspoken things

I never believed in soulmates. To me, they were nothing more than something from stories and books. I thought it was nonsense. Until I saw you.

The moment I saw you, I just knew it. I couldn't explain it, but deep in my heart, I knew right away that you were the one. Not sometime later, not after getting to know you better, but from day one. It was a feeling of certainty that I could never truly explain.

What touched me the most was the deep sense of familiarity between us. It felt as if two people who had known each other forever had found their way back to one another. From the very first moment, I could be myself. I never had to pretend, never had to hide anything. From the beginning, you felt like home.

The days were brighter with you in them. You brought so much joy and happiness into my life that even the smallest moments became unforgettable. Your smile became my happiness, and every memory we created together became something I wanted to carry in my heart forever.

And then there was the attraction. An attraction that went far beyond anything physical. It was in your eyes, in the way you thought, in your smile. The closer I got to you, the more I found myself getting lost in everything that you were.

You were the person who made me believe in something I had once thought was impossible. When I think of you today, I know you were the only person with whom everything felt right. As if my heart had known you long before our paths ever crossed. I can't explain it any other way.

I know you would find something like this silly and funny. I wish I could have seen you laugh about it.

I'm sorry. I will never forget you.

Love you.

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u/Dyzzl2506 — 10 days ago

Regret and grief

Hello everyone,

I hurt the most amazing woman and the love of my life once again. I crossed boundaries at times, complained constantly, and I was impulsive and loud.

She broke up with me many times, and yet she always forgave me in the end. Like an idiot, I could never truly change. I really wanted to, because I love her with all my heart. I went to therapy, but unfortunately it focused on the wrong approaches. Even with help, I couldn’t change. Things would go well for three months, and then I would fall back into the same hole again. The real causes were never addressed.

Now we are separated for good. I found a new therapist, which I currently have to pay for myself. There, I was diagnosed with depression and an anxiety disorder. I am going to fully commit to this therapy.

I hurt the most wonderful woman in the world so deeply that she no longer wants to see me. She still replies to me from time to time, tries to be there for me, and sometimes even talks to me on the phone. I tried to convince her to give me one more chance, because I finally understand how badly I treated her. I know it will take time for me to truly change, but I will do it and continue therapy no matter what.

I would wait for her until I find myself again, but I cannot expect that from her. She doesn’t want this anymore, and that is understandable. I have to respect her boundaries.

I carry extremely strong feelings of guilt. I hurt the most amazing woman, and I did it for years. I dream about her at night and wake up shaking. I truly love her with all my heart.

Why can people sometimes be so stupid? Why did it have to come to a complete breakup before I finally understood? Why didn’t I meet her after therapy? Why didn’t I treat her the way I truly felt about her?

How am I supposed to deal with this guilt? It keeps me from sleeping. I was a bad partner and a bad person. I wanted to give her so much. I truly gave her a lot of love. But the bad moments hurt her too deeply.

I will regret this for the rest of my life. Will I do everything I can to never become that person again? Absolutely. But none of that changes my guilt or what happened. I will always remember her and the mistakes I did. Im so sorry..

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u/Dyzzl2506 — 13 days ago