Having the worst flare up of ROCD but convincing myself it’s not ROCD and can’t tell 😭
So about a year and a half ago I had my first flare up of ROCD, I didn’t know what it was at first so broke up with my boyfriend but after finding this sub I managed to work through it and we have been fine ever since (apart from the odd day I feel ‘off’ but I feel back to normal the next day)
I have finished 20 sessions of counselling 3 weeks ago.
We have recently got back from holiday and he has a 4 year old son who I’ve known for a couple of months. He sometimes misbehaves and I’m worried I don’t love him like I do my nieces and nephews even though I logically know that I’m not supposed to at this point.
Now I have overwhelming feelings of breaking up, constant sweating, can’t eat and feel like I’m losing my mind. It’s the exact same feeling I had 1.5 years ago but now I’m telling myself nope it’s because you need to leave oh my god it’s awful 😞
I have breaks from Reddit as I get scared people will find my posts so I hope this post is allowed as I’ve just made it because I need help 😭