Getting through poor outcome
Has a serious boyfriend informed me he lied about having a job for 3 years, most of our dating relationship. We are divorced with a kid or two. He has been a doll and a sweetheart. I was taken aback after our 2nd anniversary that he lied about working. He has various plausible reasons, a serious health issue, parent death, another health issue, as reasons. Over time learning that he lived off a meager trust and then told me when the trust depleted. Has always been 50/50 from day one with a strong hold back to be cheaper after the first year, citing supporting his kid as primary reason. It was noticeable. Offered to have him move in. Observe depression in him. Reluctant to get help until recently. Although he agreed, not going on any job interview for 4 months now and not contributing to expenses (a few 100) without reminder from me. Letting him go now. Guided him to therapy. But need to set boundaries that I can’t afford to pay the rent anymore for both of us. I’ve made mistakes here. So has he. Processing that it’s best to let him go and leave him in hands that can treat the depression. Have family and friend contacts if he does not open up to them and it gets concerning if he doesn’t reach out. This is a character building and learning experience all around. Hate to not give someone a chance but need to keep boundaries. Would be great to hear how others let their loved one go under similar situation.