We thought our neighbors would be chill. How do we go ALL OUT with our window decor?
Our duplex neighbors have been the nicest folks since we moved in around October. Newlywed couple around our age, maybe late 20s. He is a pastor at a Methodist church and she does healthcare. They take out the trash, they’re quiet, and not nosy. We’ve gone out to eat, shop, even had a craft night together. They’re very funny people and always really accommodating and accepting…
Or at least, they were until I texted about putting up a little pride garden flag in the native garden that my boyfriend and I planted on our own…the one that they always brag about to their friends and thank us in passing and offering to help sometime.
My boyfriend and I are both cis bisexuals in a heterosexual relationship. We don’t go around telling everyone, of course, which means most people assume we are straight. I’m sure our neighbors are none the wiser and because of their religious slant we’ve been cautious with social topics. That changed slightly last night when I texted the wife to check and make sure if the parishioners they have over for bible study wouldn’t feel uncomfortable with it - and I added something a little presumptuous to my text: “I know you guys are cool with it, but…” yeah…big mistake.
The abbreviated response she gave me was “thank you for asking, that is so considerate!!! we would rather not have it in our shared spaces. Also, we are free this Saturday if you want to get dinner! (Blah blah blah lengthy dinner plans blah blah)”
Yes, before you roast me,* *my dumb ass assumed a young religious couple would be part of a rainbow all-are-welcome sort of church. I mean, they’re Methodists, right?? Such a gut punch. I did cry because I REALLY wanted to put a cute little rainbow flag in the garden and I did not think that our neighbor friends we share a floor/ceiling with would say that they would feel uncomfortable. I know I didn’t specify other than “pride flag,” but it’s not like I’m hanging assless chaps on the bird feeder in our front yard.
My boyfriend said they’re probably just a bit more conservative and close-minded than they have let on. And that it probably hasn’t even crossed their minds that we are both bisexual. He’s ticked off about the response as well, but wasn’t surprised.
Y’all I bought craft supplies to dragify our porch decor garden snail from Ross. And there it was, Dollar Tree sequins and fake fur, absorbing my tears. Because the other thing that really bothered me was that they probably would create some distance or view us differently. But maybe they already did, as we are an unwedded couple living together and sleeping in the same bed.
I know I was stupid to let my guard down. And maybe it would’ve been better if I didn’t ask and just did it, but again, I wanted to be neighborly and ask (and also, our landlord seems cool by letting us build a garden, but if the neighbors chose to complain…).
We share the property, at the end of the day, and I’m not willing to destroy this amicable living arrangement over a single rainbow. However…
Our upper windows are our windows, and my boyfriend said we should decorate the shit out of them. Before I texted, I felt like putting my inclusivity flag banner on the door next to theirs, but I feel that might be too much now that I had their answer and it wasn’t what I expected. I just need some ideas, because I still want to celebrate pride in my neighborhood without stirring a fuss.
Give me some advice on what stuff would be good for the window if y’all have some ideas!!! Our cats have to see out of it to look at the birds as well, though. I’m thinking window markers or window clings? Maybe rainbow fairy lights?
And btw, I did not answer her back on dinner plans. I really don’t plan to and don’t know what I will say when I see one of them outside again. if anyone has had a similar experience with someone they’ve gotten to know, feel free to share. I could use some community atm.
Thanks 🩷💜💙