u/Fast-Pie2276

My birthday is tomorrow and my job buys whoever’s birthday it is lunch. I chose a ramen place by the office that me and several other coworkers have had and love. There’s one lady that is extremely particular about where she eats and claims she ONLY eats at $$$ restaurants bc they are the only ones she believes are clean to her standards. She took it upon herself to google ai the cleanliness of this restaurant and was not satisfied with what she read. So, she decided to go around to everyone in the office and talk half of them out of ordering from there. She then came to me and let me know who wasn’t ordering and then sent out an email to the office about how the restaurant didn’t open until the hour of our usual lunch break (we can take it whenever, it’s just usually around 12-12:30). I just responded back that we can order from somewhere else and chose a burger place I know everyone likes. I don’t even like burgers. But, she made me feel so crummy about my food choice and so embarrassed-like I was disgusting for wanting to eat there. I’ve cried about it twice today (also extremely embarrassing). I wouldn’t ever normally cry over this kind of stuff but JESUS this baby wanted ramen.

It’s also upsetting bc we have ordered from places she thought were dirty in the past, but didn’t do something like this.

Edit: I do want to point out that only two people in the whole office know I’m pregnant and she wasn’t one of them. So this isn’t a “bullying the pregnant lady” moment.

I did want to add, too, that MOST people in the office were upset that she did that and didn’t understand why she felt the need to be that way. They’ve been very nice checking in on me and/or saying that they still want to order lunch from there next week.

I’m in a predicament. I’m currently 2 months pregnant with my first child. My job does not offer specified maternity leave or short term disability-they only offer FMLA. The problem here is my due date is currently 1.5 months before I reach the 12 month minimum requirement for FMLA. I do get 14 days PTO that resets on January 1st of the new year, every year. This is also the same date of my due date, give or take. My current thought is to use the 14 PTO for the last few weeks of the year, and the new 14 PTO the first two weeks of the year. However, that’s doesn’t protect my job.

I haven’t told my employer yet, as I’m waiting for confirmation scans with my dr. I’m not looking for paid leave and it could potentially be fine. I just want my job to be here when I get back and not be laid off with a new born.

I know people are going to say I should have waited. But, I’m 28 and infertility and early infertility runs on both sides of my family and I’ve already miscarried in the past-so I’m not potentially taking away this opportunity for my husband and I to satisfy my employer.

Please send any advice.