17 ,
I made a freind earlier this year, I knew she had gone through some mental health problems but that was fine, I was happy to become their freind, not to mention I went to elementary with them.
(My shcool here is Elementary K-7, HS 8 - 12)
With alot of our early conversations they would start going down a darker path and they would start venting, I said I was okay with it. I was at first. But the topics got really really heavy, and it started happening multiple times a week, I'd be up at 3am on shcool nights because I can't just leave them like that.
They started occasionally having really really bad sessions too?? I would try calming them down, but it would just loop back to the start. They would just start going off, they said these alot:
"I hate you", "I'm sorry", "I'm a horrible person", "I need to hurt somone", "oh yeah, you don't know", "you think I'm going to kms don't you?", "I'm such a freak", "I love you, and it makes me want to kms", "hurt me".
Alot of stuff like that, and it would go on like that for hours. I start getting stressed whenever I talk to them now, just worried their gonna start doing thar, and I'm gonna be stuck trying to help them. Witch is a horrible thing to say I realize, we're freinds, I should be there for them, but I'm heavily starting to resent them.
They also talk alot about wanting found family, (they grew up in a bad home), or wanting to be close to people, they've described scenarios, and have very obviously hinted at wanting them to involve me, and I know I should just be straight forward, but I've always hinted thst I don't want that. And thst I'm not much of one for physical touch.
I started. I goring there texts, saying I was "out" or "sleeping" I was keeping my online status off because I was scared they would see it.
They also share a bit too much with me. At first it was fine, but now it's been way to many details about what there into, or they'll share or send somthing and then say somthing like "oh, I'm so fucked" and it's all stuff like fetishes, that alot of them I can definitely see steming from the lack of a normal family.
They're so needy too. And I'm started to hate every interaction, but if I don't talk to them for a couple days, or get too busy they have a break down, last time I went away for 4 days to go to comic con, and the night I came back they were going off about how they didn't remember me much because I went away. Now, one of My flaws is that I have a hard time wirh needy people, even in very very small amounts. I like My alone time, I like getting to choose who to interact with and when. I like responding on My own time when it comes to freinds. Witch I know is bad, but I swear with them, it's so much worse.
Anytime we hangout, they just want to touch my hands. We decided to play Vr chat together, I was thinking shitty horror games, exploring, actually games. They just wanted to make our vr charecters cuddle. It was akward as hell.
I started therapy recently, but it's only been one session, and it's very very expensive, they're are other things I've had to start with in there. My freind is also in therapy, but they said they don't talk to their therapist. I think their working on it, but it's exhausting dealing with this. I'm started to hate them, but I don't know if I'm justified to do so. I also feel like I can't tell them I'm uncomfortable because I did say in thr begging I was okay with it all, and now I've dug a hole where I haven't said anything.