Tale of the weirdo who tanked a quality affair over a mysterious vasectomy
RANT: He lied about a vasectomy for over a year to guilt me and I just found out the truth from his wife’s unhinged Twitter account. I have never typed so fast in my life.
So gather round because this one has layers.
Let me just say that upfront before the comments get spicy. Grief from losing my mom unexpectedly did a number on my entire nervous system and sane decision making abilities.
First boyfriend from high school slid back into my life at exactly the wrong moment and I went into full affair mode after he bought a flight halfway across the country just to reunite after 15 years of last seeing each other. I committed to the bit immediately, we were having a ball!
Now here’s the setup you need to understand: He’s married with three kids. I’m married with zero kids and a fertility situation that made having children complicated. If you’ve ever navigated fertility struggles you already know the emotional weight that carries.
So this man, knowing ALL of that, decides his angle to take this affair to the next level is going to be “let me get you pregnant.” During an affair. In hotel rooms. While married to other people. Grief clouds judgment people. I cannot stress this enough. My insane brain is with the shits, but after the sex high wears off I’m def saying to myself “girl you have lost your fucking mind”
He starts to insist I leave my marriage for him. So naturally he escalates to ultimatums when I hesitate. “If you don’t commit to me in random number of weeks I’m getting a vasectomy.”
The urgency kept escalating like he was hosting some kind of twisted emotional auction. Meanwhile I’m sitting there genuinely torn like a dumbass because on one hand — married man with three kids. On the other hand — grief, fertility struggles, complicated feelings and a man who flew across the country to see me.
This goes on for AN ENTIRE YEAR. Then finally. FINALLY. He drops the news. He got the vasectomy. I waited too long.
But WAIT. Plot twist. Apparently — and I truly cannot make this up — the doctor didn’t wear gloves during the procedure and gave him herpes. And he’s suing.
I wish I was creative enough to invent this. So now I’m processing random ass vasectomy grief AND being asked to comfort a man about his doctor allegedly giving him herpes barehanded during a routine procedure. I should have left then. I know. I KNOW.
Anyway I come to my senses and the affair eventually fizzled. Emotional highs and lows was exhausting. I moved on.
He’d text / call occasionally and I’d answer if I was bored enough. Nothing serious.
Fast forward to THIS WEEK.
His wife is chronically online. Like aggressively, entertainingly, chaotically online. I occasionally lurk her Twitter purely for the unhinged energy because honestly? She’s compelling content. And today. TODAY. She posts about vasectomies.
Specifically about how her husband got his vasectomy THREE WEEKS INTO OUR AFFAIR.
Let me say that again for the people in the back. He already had the vasectomy from the jump. Before the ultimatums. Before the deadlines. Before the dramatic “if you loved me you’d choose me” screaming matches. Before the FAKE DOCTOR HERPES STORY. He was never getting anyone pregnant. He knew that the entire time.
I have never in my life typed up an epic cursing out based upon an unhinged Twitter user but that man lost his ever loving mind with the random ass lies,
Oh and I slid into his wife’s DMs with a nice little “woman to woman heads up note”
Yes I’m going out petty
We could have just had a normal ass affair like adults. Sneaking around, chasing adrenaline, bougie hotel room service.
But noooooo, homie chose to construct an elaborate year long psychological operation using my dead mother’s grief and my fertility struggles as raw material. For what? To feel chosen? To feel powerful? Sir. The audacity is actually breathtaking.
Update: Thank you for the kind responses and advice in the comments. I did get tested promptly after the doctor story and came back with a clean bill of health 🙏🏼 and also confessed to my partner what I had done, the lies and emotional turmoil of that situation were too much for me. A lot of personal growth over here. Also the wife never responded to my message but if she ever wants to or wants “revenge” and to expose me, that’s okay. It’s a risk I knew was there. I value truth over mind games. My life has def improved since this nonsense, hands down and I’m ready for a life completely void of him