Tik Tok
Tik Tok is consuming my wife. I try to talk to her but over the last few years it’s getting steadily worse. To the point it’s beginning to affect our sex life. Sex used to be fun and spontaneous but now it’s like I have to schedule an appointment and immediately after she’s right back on Tik Tok. In the beginning there were outfits and random sex now it’s like the only thing she wants to do is eat and be on Tik Tok. I was sitting in the basement with her the other night and I don’t know if it was guilt or maybe she felt I saw her screen on her phone but some random follower basically was seeing what’s up with her and she showed me . It makes me wonder why she is super protective of her phone I mean like over zealous if I grab it. One time saying she doesn’t want me to mess something up on her account. I’m thinking how can I mess something up it’s fucking Tik Tok but ever since that night I’m off kilter. She doesn’t come to bed until 2 or 3 in the morning I really don’t understand it and I see other married men detail the same things I’m actually going through but to read the exact or similar experiences has my mind going. I have no proof of something going on from a face to face standpoint but for women I’m finding they have degrees of what they consider cheating is and it varies depending on who you ask.
Before if you ask no I’m not the husband that doesn’t show appreciation. We go out 2-3 times a month for date night and our children are solid. I contribute to getting things done around to house. We travel around work whether short weekend getaways or longer trips to islands etc 4-5 times a year. I’m not over bearing in what I hear women sa y is controlling. I keep my insecurities to myself, I don’t snoop and I also don’t go looking for shit either. I would much rather leave than go through drama. But ever since the night she showed me that message it makes me wonder if she entertains any of them. And is that why sex is feeling more like charity than mutual engagement.
Btw it’s nearly 11pm and yes she’s downstairs and yes on Tik Tok. I come out of the bedroom and the way our living room is situated we have a mirror behind the couch it looks like she changes screens quickly for messages.
At this point I’m trying to figure out how to have this conversation.