31M. Is it irresponsible to start dating someone when my future/location/work situation is this uncertain?
31M here. My uncle and I recently got into a bit of a discussion where he voiced that he feels I should start getting to know people and working towards getting married and having a family which is something I do want.
But, the catch is that, for now, I'm going through the Green Card process in the US and am from one of the 19 countries Trump's put a freeze on so, for the time being, I'm still waiting on my work-permit to arrive and can't legally work until it does. I'm basically living with relatives for now and have plenty of savings to see me through for things like food, car insurance, gas, and the general day to days of life aside from rent and utilities. My days essentially consist of working on portfolio projects for my GitHub to show future employers, reading books, going to the gym, volunteering and just spending time with my relatives. I have work experience and a Master's degree in a STEM field, credit score's in the high 700s, got no debts, I'm in good health and I own some land in my home country that at its highest valuation is worth about half a mill. So, I'm not really in a fucked situation or anything. Lots of people are way more effected by this freeze than I am, but again, I'm not working and essentially "live at home".
So, my argument to my uncle was that it's incredibly selfish and irresponsible to start dating and getting to know women at a time like this where I'm not working, have no income and, to be frank, if I don't get my work permit in the next 1-2 years, I'll definitely just cut my losses and leave the US. No way in hell I'm waiting until I'm 34-35 or older to start working again. I am working with a lawyer right now to expedite the process and am even willing to join a lawsuit with other plaintiffs to help speed up my case, but truth be told, I have no clue when I might actually get my work permit, even after all of that.
I mean, say I start dating and getting to know someone and we really hit it off but in 1.5-2 years I'm still in this situation and just leave the US for any number of far away countries to find work, is she supposed to just upend her entire life, move away from her family and friends and join me? I don't want to do that to someone. It's not as big of a deal for me to move around a lot as I'm an only child, my mother's passed away, and my dad and I have a relationship where he really doesn't mind if I only visit him once every few years (though we do talk and text regularly). And all that aside, this person would also have to accept that, for the time being, even though we're grown adults in our 30s, all we can really do is talk and go on dates for possibly the next year or two until I can work again and afford to pay bills like rent, a mortgage and utilities.
My uncle's quite traditional and religious and has a very "Leave it in God's hands" attitude about the whole thing and he's also of the opinion that I should let the other person decide if they're willing to work through a period like this with me. I won't lie, I do miss having a partner but again, the irresponsibility of bringing all this uncertainty into someone's life really bothers me and I can't imagine many women in their 30s would even be interested given my work situation as they understandably tend to be more serious when dating.
Figured getting people I don't know's perspective on this might be interesting and help. My uncle, friends and other relatives just don't like to see me alone or having my life on pause so I don't think they're being objective. Women on here's perspective would be especially interesting but chaps are more than welcome as well, of course.