u/Illustrious_Oven_755

She has early stage dementia and she just tried to k1ll herself because my mom and aunt are putting her into an assisted living home. She has always said she would off herself if she got put in one and that’s what she tried today, hours before moving in. Now she’s in the hospital, in stable condition and un-injured. My mom was scheduled to leave town tomorrow (my mom and I live states away from her), and said she doesn’t know what’s going to happen if the assisted living place won’t take her - now that she’s a suic\*\*\* risk. My mom has been helping her but now wants nothing to do with her because she’s called my mom the devil, hit her, slapped her and tried to push her down the stairs. So my mom is coming home. My aunt is also not so involved because just grandma has called the police on her and called her evil.

I don’t know how to cope with all this. I just finished my school semester and will be starting a really prestigious internship in July. I was going to spend June studying ahead for next semester and relaxing after a super stressful school year. Now I’m feeling like I should fly to my grandma to be with her and help figure out what to do next but I also feel so unsure of what to do or how to help, my mom has conservatorship of her so I don’t know how much I can help. I just feel like I’m drowning and don’t know what to do

She calls me at least once per day, lately closer to three times per day during the week to tell me something she thought of, remind me of something, or catch up. Each call is about 20 minutes - 30 minutes. I’m coming out of a long school year, so my patience for the daily calls is waning. I take them because if I don’t she gets upset and says “what if I said I didn’t want to talk to you? You’ve called me at all hours of the day and I always answered” (referring to my early 20s when I would call her a lot more for advice). I also have a hard time telling her I want to talk less because I am financially reliant on her, she helps me with bills while I go to school full time.

I feel like my low tolerance for daily conversation is AuDHD related. I’m wondering if anyone here has been successful in setting boundaries with chatty loved ones?