Please share your Wisdom with me.
I knew my husband before I had a driver's license. He was always hitting on girls, tons of cheating rumors, but never proof until after I had our 1st, with our 1st child. I left, and we reconciled a few years later we had our youngest. Then I found out he had a relationship with my 1st cousin, who is 10 years younger than him. He never told me. I found pictures. We have tried reconciling. Had both good and terrible days. He doesn't want to break up, I've offered it many times with only commitment being the kids. He doesn't have to pay any support for me, and we split the kids' costs. Offered our home & all furniture. He says he loves me and wants me. YET - We never have sex. I'm talking for years, maybe, 3x a year for the last 5 years. I'm very unhappy - I've told him. He ignores all conversations and says we're "stuck" together.
He works 12-14 hrs a day. Every week. He is alone at his office after 3 pm. Neighbor told me about live cam sex and that he speaks so low of me behind my back. It breaks my heart. I don't want to sound bad. I have flaws, but I have stayed attractive, I had to lose babuweight after our last. But I'm the sane weight as before, babies. Men hit on me when I went out. Which is very rare anymore. He didn't care when I said the neighbor begged to sleep with me. He said something but then was all best friends following. Them the neighbor tried to kiss me & kept saying come on .... please kiss me with lips and being too close to my face. I told him this & he didn't care at all. After that, I looked into the live sex accusations, and they're true. Live interactive paid services, plus secret message boards. apps, secret sites, signal, telegram, interpals, livecam24, matrdon whatever its called. I didn't u understand why i wasn't enough in my early 20s, Ileft him ar 27, and he did everything to stay connected to me. Not just our child. We reconciled when i was 30, engaed again, had our 2nd. Then it was reliving a nightmare i had been through but nych worse, betrayal with family member. My youngest 1st cousin. I'm a good woman and not boring privately with him when we did have a *** life. There was never a reason for him to string me along from the start. I pray talking to normal people helps me find my strength again. I was always loving.but never stupid and I was strong. He took all everything from me. But God blessed me with my 2 babies I'm lonely and hurt, and I need honesty and respect. I should say 25 years, 2 children.. He keeps his finances a secret. I know, just leave. He wanted me home for our kids - I'm extremely grateful. I think I deserved upfront honesty at the least after forgiving the unforgivable after his teary-eyed apology.
Any advice - Helps.
Ladies- I love to hear from you. We have to keep sisterhood alive. Im really interested in a male perspective in this post, brutal honesty, if needed.
Im praying I meet the person who is meant for me, I don'twantto entermy bext decade in confusion again like the 2 prior. In my 30s still, I'm loving, I know his betrayals did a number on my heart and health. Any husband - please tell me the truth of what is happening here, please.