Excited to announce our first WCBWT meetup - details below! Thanks to the initial post commenters for helping get this going! I’ll post an RSVP link 1 week out.

DATE:
Thursday, August 27th

TIME:
5:30 PM (happy hour ends at 6, but no way I can get out of work earlier)

WHERE:
El Primo, 166 Mamaroneck Ave, White Plains, NY 10601

NOTE:
- This is a 21+ event
- Fellow BWT only please (leave kids and husbands at home)
- Name tags provided!

I am just closing out 1 year of infertility and IVF treatments and I switched clinics midway through. I started out at RMA and switched to Columbia and thought it might be helpful to do a review/comparison for any other BWT who are looking at IVF options here in Westchester.

This is REALLY long! So buckle up.

A bit about me:
Early 30’s, no children, no previous pregnancies, severe diminished ovarian reserve, and a laughably low AMH. The infertility is all on my side of the house; husband has annoyingly good sperm lol. I have Progyny through my employer. Disclaimer: I currently do not have any blasts frozen nor am I pregnant. This review is not based on the outcome of my treatment at one over the other, which I hope means it’s not biased.

TLDR: Columbia was hands down the better experience for me and I would suggest it over RMA to anyone.

Initial consult

RMA
We started at RMA for literally no other reason than they had availability asap when we reached out. I think we were able to see them within the week. The initial consult was in person and took about 90 minutes, but it did include an ultrasound as I happened to be in the right part of my cycle.

Columbia
Virtual visit. I have never actually met my doctor in person. They have much more limited appointments than RMA; they are booked and busy and I waited about six weeks for my appointment.

Offices

RMA
The white plains location is kind of tired and the waiting room is small. Twice I turned up for my appointment and there were people standing in the corridor outside. The office in Mt Kisco is much nicer. There is no semblance of privacy in the waiting room, it’s so tiny and cramped.

The infuriating thing about RMA is that even though you book a time for your monitoring appointments, they don’t actually mean anything. They basically operate on a first come, first served basis and more often than not, they were running late. It’s really frustrating to be sat there for 30 minutes, 45 minutes, past your appointment, every time you go in. When you’re there multiple times over a two week period, that time really adds up. Plus, they do bloodwork and then most of the time you have to go and sit down and wait for them to call you through for the ultrasound, so even if they’re on time, the appointments feel drawn out.

I found the front desk staff at White Plains to be nicer than the staff Mt Kisco. Checking in at Mt Kisco was giving real, “when the receptionist doesn’t care if you live or die” vibes.

You will make most of your monitoring appointments over the phone with the nurse, but can also send a message in the portal.

Columbia
Lovely offices, they play spa music, it’s quiet and calm and never had the manic energy that RMA sometimes had.

They were also always on time! I think I waited 15 minutes over my appointment time once. They do blood then you go straight into the room for your ultrasound.

You self-schedule your appointments via their website which was super helpful to feel a little in control there. One thing to note: the White Plains office is not open on weekends and holidays and they do not do retrievals at that location. So you’ll need to schlep into the city for weekend appointments (which I only had to do once over the course of three months) and egg retrievals.

Nurses + Monitoring appointments

RMA
The nurses here were nice, but it wasn’t until I moved to Columbia that I realised they were actually just fine? They were polite and friendly at my appointments but it did feel like they were going through the motions. I know a lot of people say IVF feels like you’re in a factory and that’s really how it felt at RMA. It got to the point on my third cycle where I was almost crying ahead of my office visits because of the thought of having to go in and get undressed and deal with the ultrasound again. It felt very dehumanizing at RMA.

I also ended up really not liking my doctor and that was a big struggle. If I knew he was going to be doing the ultrasound, I would be awake for half the night panicking about it, and I would just tense up during the exam.

A nurse would call me every afternoon after my monitoring appointments to tell me the meds for the next few days.

Pretty much all communication happens via their portal or over the phone. They are pretty responsive on the portal.

Columbia
Again, my experience here was night and day to RMA. The people who do the ultrasounds are RN’s or NP’s and they talk you through everything and wait for you to consent before they do literally anything. Which after being poked and prodded so many times over the last few months really felt like a small but lovely thing do. They took their time too - I never felt rushed. They also seemed to read my chart and would talk me through things.
I never once had any of the dread or fear that I had at RMA.

I would get an email around 2pm/3pm with instructions for the next few days from my main nurse. Which I loved - as a millennial I will do anything to not talk on the phone so the fact Columbia communicates mainly via email was great.

They have a portal but it’s really only used for posting your blood results. All other communications is via email or phone call.

Doctors

RMA
I mentioned before, but I really disliked my doctor. I wish I had moved to someone else sooner than I did. I did not feel like he treated me like an individual at all. I think if you went in as textbook “normal” IVF patient who responds as expected to the meds, maybe your experience would be different, but as someone with DOR who frankly requires a little more thought and care, I never felt like he really bothered to figure out a plan to work with my body.

It was like he was just going through a checklist of different protocols. Also, he would routinely tell me my MAJOR EGG FACTOR was the reason this and that wasn’t working (and would literally yell this - more than one occasion I had to hold the phone away from my ear). He was also infuriating in that he would never give his opinion. He would say we could do A or B. What do you want to do? Sir, I am paying you for your medical opinion and knowledge, you tell me your recommendations and I will go from there. He was so non-committal. I would often get off the phone with him and burst into tears because I was so frustrated over his lack of guidance. The only thing that sets RMA apart from Columbia was that I did see him in person a fair few times.

Columbia* *
My doctor at Columbia was totally different to RMA. She was so kind and would call me up frequently and talk through the different options and approaches we could try. I felt like she was truly invested in my treatment, that she cared about the outcome, and she treated me as an individual who has DOR instead of just another patient to get to the finish line. I also had some really annoying things crop up with my insurance and she helped me navigate them (also shout out to her finance person, who was absolutely wonderful and seemed as invested as my doctor in making sure everything worked out).

Egg retrieval

RMA** **
This is the only area that RMA was marginally better. Not for the actual procedure - you’re sedated so no idea what was happening - but more so the pre- and post-care. I was told to get there one hour before my retrieval time which I felt was a good amount of time to get settled etc.
The prep/recovery area is a little nicer at RMA (although the views out to Central Park from the Columbia bathroom are amazing lol).
The recovery nurses are all so calming and really kind and just, very sweet. The doctor performing the procedure came in briefly to say hi and everyone in the operating room was nice.

The anaesthesiologists I saw were lovely and talked through what they were going to do and made sure I felt ok about everything, and they hooked me up to my IV drip and gave me saline to start to make sure I was nice and hydrated. The first one I had was my favorite - she helped get me up on the bed and then told me she’d give me the sedative the second my legs were in the stirrups so I’d be out before it got awkward lol. I did not love the operating table - it has a hole for your booty and the stirrups were basically by my ears so I felt like I was in happy baby pose but, I was out before I could worry too much ha.

When I woke up I was back in my little recovery room propped up on an actual bed with some snacks next to me and a juice box.l also had heat packs on my abdomen and was sitting on a little pee pee pad lmao. I had no pain when I woke up which was wonderful! The nurses popped in a few times to check on me, make sure I was ok, check on my pain etc. they also told me how many eggs they’d got. I had to sit there for about 30 minutes or so before they walked me out to meet my husband, and they sent me off with more heat packs.

They called me the next day to let me know how many were mature, and they told me they would call me again at day 3, day 5, day 6 etc.

We did not get any viable embryos from my time at RMA and my doctor did call me after each round to tell me, which I appreciated.

Columbia
This one def felt more like a hospital setting, was more hustle and bustle and the nurses were kind but a bit more brusque. You are told to get there only 30 minutes before the procedure and whisked into the recovery room pretty quickly where a nurse goes over paperwork. The doctor who was performing the procedure came and said hi and checked to make sure I was OK. Then I was walked into the room, and the anaesthesiologist put the port into my hand in the operating room. They had me put my legs in the stirrups but they covered me with a blanket which was a nice touch. The anaesthesiologist could not have given less of a fuck about me though ha. He barely said one word to me, didn’t explain what he gave me, what would happen, literally not a peep.

I woke up back in my recovery area sitting in a recliner chair with the legs out. I wasn’t quite as comfortable as I had been at RMA - I felt like I woke up because my head was lolling around lol. Had some snacks next to me and they brought my husband in to sit with me once I was awake which was nice. The nurse who was looking after me just yelled at me through the curtain to ask if I was ok instead of actually coming in to see me which, whatever. The doctor and the doctor who was assisting him both came in and told me how many eggs they’d got which I thought was nice, and then I was out and on my way.

As with all their other communication, they email you the next day with info about how many are mature, and then again with updates as the days progress.

So to sum up: In my personal experience, Columbia wins. For my specific circumstances, I found them to be a much better facility.

If you made it this far - yay well done! Hit me up with any questions if you have them.

Okay WCBWT, tell me all your favorite coffee shops.

When I think about coffee shops “with taste”… For me, taste does not equal “expensive” or “good vibes,” it means done with intention.

I’m looking for ideally: (1) baristas who care about the foam (2) option for real cups (3) leaning lighter roast coffees and (4) local (not chain). Here’s what I’ve found so far that hits 3/4 of these things.

NORTH
Mimi’s
Blue Heron
Bluestone lane

CENTRAL
PortRush Coffee
Blue Hill Stone Barns

Where are you finding good coffee?!?!

I’ve been in westchester for 3 years and still cannot seem to find a really great haircut. I’ve had a bob forever and I’ve been going back upstate to get my hair cut but I can’t keep driving over an hour for it. Can anyone recommend a hair salon anywhere in westchester that does a great bob? I’ve been to Josef Mikel and a few places around Pleasantville/ Briarcliff and none of them have been a great cut. I’m not hat in on those places but specifically for a bob they’ve all come out uneven.

UPDATE: I went to Caryn at Nourish in Peekskill for a cute and a tinted glaze and I could not be happier! She was so precise and the nicest human ever. I ended up doing a super short bob and I’m so happy with the way it turned out.

Date: Friday, August 21st at 8PM
Location: Wolf and Warrior brewery (White Plains)

Looking to meet new people and make friends in Westchester? All are welcome! The goal of this meetup group is to build connections, network, and form friendships within the Westchester community. Or to simply meet new people.

- We’re a diverse group of people who live or work in Westchester County, coming from a variety of backgrounds and careers. We’re simply looking to meet new people and enjoy fun activities together. People have a variety of hobbies and interests; such as pickle ball, hikes/walks, movie nights, trying new restaurants, gaming, war hammer, attending local events and food festivals etc.

- Typical age range: early/mid 20s to early 40s.
- This is a 21+ event****
- All genders welcome

There will be name tags available. We will congregate at the bar as usual. Extra space is also downstairs

Feel free to DM me with any questions or leave a comment.

Hi everyone! I’m looking for an affordable private nail tech in Westchester! Preferably someone who does Gel-X or acrylic. Please drop your recommendations/IGs below!

I really need some advice/help because I honestly don’t know what else to do.
I’ve been unemployed since the beginning of July. Since then, I’ve sent out 500+ applications and gone on 15+ interviews, and I still haven’t been able to get a job.
I’m not someone who doesn’t want to work. I’m actually extremely hardworking. When I say first one in, last one out, I mean it. I’m willing to work 10–12+ hour days if that’s what I need to do. I have a 1yr old, but being a mom does not stop me from working or wanting to work.
I would love a normal 9–5 Monday-Friday job, but I also have to be realistic. I can’t just go work at McDonald’s for $15–17 an hour because that isn’t going to fix my situation. I need something starting around $24–$25+ an hour where I can actually support myself and my child.
For some background, I have experience in healthcare scheduling, radiology/mammogram scheduling, customer service, management, lead server / assistant manger, and working with people. I’m also bilingual and have my cosmetology license ( I haven’t did hair in over 5 years lost the passion). If anyone can look at that experience and tell me what type of jobs I should actually be applying for, I would really appreciate it because at this point I feel like I’m applying to everything and getting nowhere.
But honestly, my biggest problem right now is my living situation.
My rent is $2,000 a month, and I still haven’t been able to pay it for this month I’m 800 short . I simply cannot afford it right now. I’ve gone to DSS and was told that the only way they can put me into a shelter is if I receive an eviction notice.
And I understand that they have rules, but I just keep thinking… how am I supposed to do that to my landlord? How can I purposely let things get that bad and put my problems onto someone else? I don’t want to get evicted. I don’t want to lose my home. I just need help before it gets to that point.
I’ve been researching affordable housing, low income housing, rent assistance, housing programs, and anything else I can find for hours and hours. I have been applying to things for years honestly, since I was pregnant. Every time I think I find something, I end up at another dead end.
I’m also a single mother. My child’s father is incarcerated and possibly facing deportation, so realistically, I don’t have much support or anyone to fall back on. It’s basically just me trying to figure everything out.
So I’m asking specifically to anyone in Yonkers/ White plains or anywhere in Westchester County:
Does anyone know of a caseworker, social worker, organization, church, program, or ANY resource that actually helps single mothers in situations like mine?
Especially someone who can help me with:
Low-income or affordable housing
Rent assistance
Rent-stabilized housing
Housing for single mothers
Childcare assistance
Emergency assistance before an eviction happens
Navigating housing programs that I may not know about
Or even helping me figure out what programs I actually qualify for
And if you know of jobs around $24–$25+ an hour that I might qualify for based on my experience, PLEASE tell me about those too.
I’m not looking for a handout. I want to work. I want to pay my bills. I want to take care of my baby and keep a roof over our heads. I’m willing to work extremely hard. I just need someone to point me in the right direction.
I promise you, I have spent countless hours researching this stuff. I’m not posting this because I haven’t tried. I’m posting because I’ve tried and I keep hitting dead ends.
Any mamas who have been through something similar, especially in White plains /Westchester, or anyone who knows of a program, caseworker, housing resource, or job that could help please let me know.
Even if you think it’s something obvious, please tell me. At this point, I’m willing to try anything.