Trans & Non-Binary

It's my birthday today and it's been pretty shitty so far. I don't want to go into details but everyone who's said happy birthday to me has dead named or misgendered me. There are other things that have gone wrong but I don't want to go into that rn

Edit: Thank you all for your amazingly kind words. I definitely don't have the time to reply to all of you but I have every single one of your comments and they've made my day just a tiny bit better. Thank you all again so much

so my wife and i were practicing my makeup and clothes at home last night. she looked at me and said i actually looked pretty good and natural, so on a sudden impulse we decided to just go out to a quick party nearby.

in my outfit and heels I couldn’t even move or walk the way i used to. i was literally shimmering with fear the whole time.

right when we were entering, i felt a sudden slap on my hip from behind. I froze and turned around fast, but it was so crowded at the entrance i couldn’t even tell who did it. i tried to tell myself maybe someone just bumped into me.

then later while i was standing there ordering a drink, it happened AGAIN. another clear slap on my hip. I spun around to look or say something, but whoever it was just blended right back into the crowd like nothing happened.

we panicked and left for home immediately. in the car my wife just looked at me and said, "this is literally what happens to most girls."

now i am just sitting at home scared and honestly afraid of boys.

NO WORDS TO DESCRIBE FURTHER !!!

Skirts and dresses make me feel so good and gender euphoric but just wearing underwear under feels so weird what do cus women do just deal with it????

Hey all. I'm in the process of applying for jobs and trying to figure out what to do.

I have a job interview coming up soon and I told my girlfriend that I was considering sending a message to the hiring manager that basically says something like (in professional language, of course) "Hey, so just to let you know, I'm a trans woman. If that's going to be an issue, please feel free to cancel the interview and we can go our separate ways."

My logic was that it would maybe put people in a position to go "Oh that's not a problem" and then be more accepting--similar to how people are generally a bit more forgiving towards people who they know are autistic vs those they don't know are autistic.

My gf said absolutely don't do that and said I should just boymode for the interview and then only come out after I get the job. lol

I'm just curious what y'all think about sending a message like that before a job interview.

HRT is nothing short of magic. I have been on it a month and a half and I am a completely different person mentally. My brain just works in a way it never has before and I have virtually no dysphoria (at least comparatively). I am baseline happy for the first time in my life. It is great.

Buuuut.

With all the new brainjuice, I have started hyper-focusing on one thought, "This is just too good to be true, right?"

Lemme explain.

My nipples are sore af and I definitely have breast buds. I am right at the cusp of "irreversible changes" to my body, so if I am going to quit, now is the time. Already might be too late tbh.

I have wanted to transition for decades and have gone to many dark places because of it. I literally could not imagine myself in 5 years because... Well, you know. Did not think I would make it that far.

That said, now that I am actually transitioning, I am suddenly neutral. Like, I do not mind physical changes, but I also do not mind presenting as a male forever. I already got the mental changes I was looking for, so everything else is just icing on the cake.

Moreover, people are saying I am already really close to passing. Not just on reddit, but people use feminine pronouns for me when stopping me on the street (even with men's clothes and stubble). Heck, even people I interact with semi-regularly do so nowadays. I video called my parents a week ago and just couldn't see a guy in the self-facing camera. I got some messages from my mom after, so I think she is on to me.

So, what is the catch here? What am I missing? Hormones are working. I look good (enough). I'm a little nervous about strength loss and locker room situations, but neither one is a huge deal. What is the "thing" that I am missing about HRT that is going to scare me off of it in the future?

I think the problem is that I don't see myself as a woman right now. I mean, I love seeing a woman in the mirror. Simply putting on a swimsuit will get rid of any dysphoria I might be having. But when I think about walking about as a woman, I get stage fright.

When I look at other women on the street, I think about their outfits and styles. Maybe about the amount of time they likely spent in the gym. Sometimes I will think about how my boobs are either bigger or smaller than their's.

It just very much feels like the perspective of an outsider, and I don't know if it is ok to continue HRT with such feelings.

Like, I am a "guy with gender dysphoria who happens to be taking hormones, likes to appear feminine, has done voice training and laser, and uses she / her pronouns on occasion." Not a woman.

TL;DR; HRT is magic. I love it. What is the catch? Am I enough of a woman to keep taking it or should I quit?

I'm a 19 year old trans girl and I've been on hrt for like 11 and a half months and i kind of hate how my boobs look. I have like a cups and to me they look just like manboobs but I'm skinny so idek i just feel so gross looking at myself. When I wear a bra I feel better because they take on a better shape and my chest dysphoria reduces day by day simply by knowing that my chest isn't flat anymore when I have a shirt on or something but i literally cannot stand to look at myself naked in the mirror. I feel so disgusted and gross when i dress myself or take a shower and it's really getting to me. I don't know why I feel this way and i wish I could just feel comfortable the way I am. My body is just so gross

Okay so this may be a stretch but I need advice. For reference I’m trans mtf and I was at the bar last night and this guy was hitting on me. This isn’t like a normal fun bar. It’s my hometown cigarette dive bar that me and my friends go to out of convenience. He buys me a shot of tequila and lets me watch the bartender pour it so I know it was safe. Well we’re flirting with eachother and we end up kissing. Now I’m pretty new to dating as a trans woman and it’s been exclusively dating apps until this encounter. We end up going to my car and making out and touching up on eachother a little before I tell him I have to go to my friend’s house (the girl I had been out with. The plan was to go to her place after) I give him my number and he texts me. This happened yesterday and we’ve only sent a couple texts back and forth today but we’ve been nursing our hangovers. I don’t regret it and wouldn’t mind seeing him again but I definitely have to tell him I’m trans before it goes any further. What I’m asking is do I tell him and risk him being upset about it (I don’t want to put myself in a dangerous situation) or do I just put an end to it and he’d be none the wiser. I live in a DEEP red state and he mentioned he was traditional. I also wasn’t dolled up and I don’t think I pass all that much so maybe he already knew. I definitely WANT to tell him just in case he’s okay with it and it turns into something good. I don’t know I’m very torn.

!!!!EDIT FOR MORE REFERENCE!!!!
I found his Facebook and turns out he voted for tr**p and is very religious. So when he says traditional, I think he meant nuclear family conservative maga which is weird given the fact he’s Hispanic but that’s none of my business. Just kinda bummed out because it was very exciting and affirming. I still wanna tell him JUST IN CASE but like also I wouldn’t accept that from someone who already knew I was trans.

They were just checking of course before they updated my xrays but it was very euphoric :)

I let them know that i was trans and so probably not.

First time its ever happened anywhere!

Hi, beautiful sisters! 🥰💕

I'm 38 years old, and I started HRT on July 23rd. In just a few days, I'll be celebrating my third month! 🩷

For so many years, I kept a part of myself hidden. I was afraid of what people would think, afraid of being judged, and sometimes even afraid to admit to myself how much I wanted to live as the woman I truly am.

But something has changed.

And I'm not just talking about hormones. 🥹

Yes, my skin is becoming softer, my breasts have started developing (and oh my goodness, these little girls can be sensitive! 🤭🤣), and I'm noticing small changes in my body.

But the most beautiful changes are happening inside me.

I'm slowly becoming more confident. I'm allowing myself to be feminine without feeling ashamed. Sometimes I put on something pretty, look in the mirror, and just smile… because for a little moment, I see the woman I've been longing to see for so long. 🥹💕

And then there are those unexpected moments when a stranger calls me a woman, without knowing anything about my journey. Those moments stay in my heart longer than I can explain. 🩷

Of course, not everything is easy. I still have fears, insecurities, difficult days, and a long journey ahead of me.

But for the first time, I'm not just dreaming about becoming myself.

I'm actually doing it. 🥹

I know starting at 38 might seem late to some people, but I'm beginning to realize that it's not too late to finally choose yourself.

So I wanted to ask you, beautiful girls…

What was the first little moment in your transition that made you think, "Oh my God… this is really happening. I'm finally becoming ME"? 🥰🩷

Sending you all a big hug! 💕

​

Hi,

I've created the first Reddit community for trans people in Quebec.

I find it weird there wasn't one already but now it's done 😊

https://www.reddit.com/r/QuebecTransgenre/s/Amd0RyZke1

I’ve been transitioning for over 1.5 years and am still going by the name/nickname I was given at birth. I don’t hate it but it’s just starting to feel a little weird on me. It’s rather androgynous which was great for pre-transition me! I come across as very motherly now, so that name doesn’t really match my vibe anymore.

I love the name Tara (pronounced as taer-uh or tar-ruh) and I started by using that name while hoeing around online lol. It felt like a very inconsequential place to try out names but Tara was the first one I tried and it immediately felt correct. I feel like it fits the dichotomy of my promiscuous yet prudish, hippy yet valley girl vibe.

I told my first gen Asian American mother about wanting to go by Tara and she had almost zero response. Which is the equivalent of jumping up and down with joy in my household!

So yeah… I think it’s time to be Tara!

“We no longer allow discussions, debates, arguments etc over whether nonbinary is trans. It is. This does not mean any specific nonbinary person is obligated to identify as trans. Please respect this rule and refrain from any arguments about it.” — is the text of the rule.

This now nonnegotiable in this subreddit. This is a fact that has been known about nonbinaryness since it was coined. Nonbinary was never not categorically trans. Please respect this rule—if you have issues being referred to as trans, you are completely free as an individual person not to use that word! A subreddit can’t make you call yourself trans if you don’t want to.

But please respect that we have to now make this rule explicitly clear because lately multiple discussions have caused back and forth arguments because, despite being told you can opt out of personal trans identity, a handful of people (usually with no or very little other usage of this subreddit) have come in here to argue about it.

I want to leave comments here open but also I don’t know what other words I can say to indicate this isn’t up for debate. The rule is set. It’s not going to change. Trying to argue it is a waste of your time and the mod team’s.

Not every subreddit will be a perfect fit! If you can’t respect this rule please use another subreddit. Or even start one. I know people act like I’m being a jerk when I suggest that but I don’t know why. If someone wants to make a subreddit without this rule, you could even advertise it here in the comments. This rule is specifically about the culture of this subreddit and is not trying to control the entirety of nonbinary identity.

I just broke up with my girlfriend and it hurts so bad. I love her but she's straight it'll never work. I can't stop crying, I know she's crying too. I've struggled with suicide through these 19 miserable years of existence but it was only this bad when I was 14. I've been repressing for so many years after I quit being catholic and struggling with an eating disorder I started to delay puberty at around 13. If it wasn't for the fact she'd blame herself I'd kill myself.

I told her I was repressing nearly three months ago after she wanted to move in for the start of the new semester and it broke both of us. She cried and called her friend, I was under the impression she only stayed due to me saying I'd repress till the day I died. She's been really distant since then, and I thought it'd make breaking up easier since I assumed the distance meant she wanted to leave as well but NOPE. I literally have never seen someone so distraught in my entire life. I feel so fucking terrible but I can't keep repressing, I was lucky I hit puberty late due to my eating disorder but with hairs are starting to grow on my face and my voice getting deeper I can't take the dysphoria any more. I knew I had to make the jump or I wouldn't be able to go on anymore, within four years I'll get my degree and transitioning around highschoolers sounds like hell.

On a better note I just bought estrogen and since I literally look 14 years old I think I have a good shot of passing. Thank you all for the comfort this board has given me in the past few years

So, I am a trans girl, despite a mountain of imposter syndrome, I confirm that. I want to be a girl always.
But my sexual orientation is a mystery. I recently found out that I am romantically attracted to men. I am sexually aroused by femininity but I am not attracted, I want to embody it. For a long time I feared I am just autogynephilic, but no. I want to be a girl at all times regardless of my libido. What do you think I am ?

So, my last dose of EV was on Wednesday, and the day after I found out I’ve been injecting it wrong lol…so now I’m tempted…do I wait till Wednesday to do it right, or do I change my injection day to Sunday? 2.5mg 1x a week EV

So

I got an orchie a bit more than 2 months ago and my total T level has increased and stabilized at 12 ng/dl (up from 7 ng/dl when I was on blockers)

And my Free testosterone has risen to 1/37 ng/dl up from 0./98 ng/dl

What the hell is happening? What should I do?

My SHBG is also 130nmol/L

My boobs are growing! My nipples hurt like hell and I know it’s a good thing! They’re growing way faster than I thought they would. I still have to boy mode, my bosses aren’t exactly positive towards trans people, at work till I can get a full time job. I need the money and can’t get hired anywhere else right now.

I haven’t seen a lot of people talk about this, I’m only 4 days on T (very early days I know) but I feel like any minor changes I’ve noticed (slight body odour change, tingling sensation in my groin, slight lower back ache) I am worried it’s all just placebo, is this normal to feel early on? Just wanted to know since I haven’t read about this before! :)