Pride & Community

I [NB, 30] have been trying to come up with a dominant title for myself. I don't feel like parental terms work for me, and specifically gendered terms (at least, in the dominant side) make me feel uncomfortable.

Does anyone have any ideas or experience in this subject, please? Thank you.

My girlfriend just said that I’m the fem one in our relationship, and just compaired me to a bi femme girl and also she said that out of the two of us she’s more masc. (edit: im FTM )

I don’t know why but this has hit me really hard.
I know there’s nothing wrong with being more femme or what not.
But she knows I have lots of dysphoria around being “femme”, not passing and how others see me.

We do have lots of discussions/arguements about the things she says which upset me. So I know exactly how it will go down if I mentioned this to her. And I don’t know if I want another argument about the same shit.

Her response (if I mention this, or her previous comments) would be along the lines of…
“oh I didn’t mean it like that”
“why are you so sensitive about it”
“That’s not what I meant and you know it”
“Why are you being so grumpy about it”
“It was a joke”

Why is it that her comments hit me so deep and I can’t just get over them and move forward.

(This post is cross posted 😊)

Title mainly says it, idk if it just my algorithms catching up since I don’t use social media often or not. I’m gay and trans ftm so it just confuses the hell out of me how people can be gay and be homophobic to lesbians specifically (for example) or queer people being transphobic. Like who cares who somebody is attracted to or what gender identity they have

Any good states to move to as a teacher? Currently teaching in Texas and need to relocate. They are trying to get rid of teachers that are LGBT in Texas and have been discussing it. We love California but also know it is incredibly expensive. Any ideas?

I find them attractive. I don't like the way I look. I am trying to lose weight so I can have a small body fat percentage. Is it OK for me to hate how I look until I am able to be thin?

Hi all,

I'm (37M, married to F) a little new to this so apologies in advance if I say something stupid. I've been straight (or so I thought) for most of my life. Turns out, after a few years of therapy and starting to workout and invest in myself, I am pansexual. I recently talked to my wife about it for the first time and everything went pretty well. She said she's thought that for years at this point. So that all went well and I am really relieved about that.

Now I'm not really sure what to do or who to tell. In some ways I feel like I don't really need to tell anyone (obviously aside from this message). Not because I'm ashamed - though I am still struggling through a significant amount of shame - but more because I don't think it changes my relationships with people at this point. I'm not in an open relationship and I'm committed to my wife.

Obviously there isn't a playbook or right way to do this, but I'm wondering if anyone has had a similar experience. What did it look like for you?

Does anyone encountered the same?

What is it called when you have had sexual intercourse that didn’t feel uncomfortable at the moment but a few hours later it made you extremely uncomfortable and every time you think about it even after 5 months later you wanna rip your skip out and die and forget about that happened Beacause you’re disgusted but sometimes u still get horny and then her completely disgusted again and hate yourself and find everything disgusting and hating everyone that tells reminds you that you had sexual intercourse

HELLL YEAAAAAHHHHH, so for the context my family is muslim and its usually more stricter than christian families for muslims to accept lgbt, But today i was facetiming my mom and she started talking about my long hair and said „my son just go to barber and get it removed“ this was like the hundredth time she said it so i got angry nd js hung up, then couldnt stop thinking abt this and Just straight up wrote her that im gay and explained it to her. btw ive not been home in 2 years and im in europe, she is in uzbekistan. and then she said „ If you dont regret this later, then do what you want“ WHICH IS BASICALLY ACCEPTANCE RIGHTTTTTT?????

I'm a gay guy and I live in a community where almost everyone around me is straight.

I've noticed a pattern over the years. I'll become friends with a guy, we'll get along well, joke around, hang out, and things feel completely normal. Then, at some point, I tell him I'm gay.

After that, something changes.

It's not that anyone says anything openly homophobic. Instead, they become more distant. They stop opening up to me, stop inviting me to things as often, and it feels like I'm no longer "one of the guys." The friendship doesn't usually end overnight—it just slowly fades.

The weird part is that I'm still the exact same person. Nothing about our friendship changes except that they now know one more fact about me.

At the same time, I also find it difficult to build close friendships with women because I'm still a guy, and a lot of them understandably have boundaries around male friendships.

Sometimes it feels like I'm stuck in this weird middle ground where I don't fully fit into either group.

I'm not looking for pity. I just want to know if anyone else—especially other gay men—has experienced this. Is this a common experience, or have I just been unlucky with the people I've met?

Omg I just don’t know. Can’t sleep and feel nauseous….. wtf. So anyone I’m a 50 yrs old bi guy. Always been in the closet and so scared to attempt to date or even do stuff with a guy. Did experiment with a few quick hookups with dudes. Just light stuff such as jacking each other off and sucking each other a bit. Even then I felt sick to my stomach afterward and felt so guilty. Attempted to talk to some guys over the years. But just not attracted to many men at all. And flaked a lot. Always just so skeptical about guys wanting to meet right now and then if you do not meet right away they disappear. So anyway I stated talking to a younger 28 year old guy. And actually found him cute with an amazing perfect slim body. So we exchange numbers. Chatted a bit and waited a few days to meet in person. And we met at a little Italian cafe, just talked and ate, then he invited me back to his place. I was hesitant and nervous as hell. He is just way too good looking for me. We go into his place and he invites me right into his bedroom and he just strips right down naked right into front of me. So I also get naked. And he just starts kissing me and I kiss back lips locked deep in kissing. He then kissing my neck and body as I do the same kissing him everywhere. Still in just awe of his beauty. I tell him how fucking hot he is and his big beautiful dick rubbing against my cock felt amazing.
So he sucks me first a bit and then I do the same and touched and kissed a lot then had sex. Omfg. Wow wow. After we showered and laid together. I kept telling him his freakin hot he is. Think I creeped him out a bit. He did say he wanted not to be serious with anyone. He’s only here temporarily for a job and has to leave in a few months. He politely just asked me to leave. And I left. Same a message that night. And another yesterday for 4th of July. But have yet to hear back from him. I’m not sending any more messages. I’m freakin a bit. And keep thinking about him. Omg. Think I’m more gay than I thought.

Hello there. Just pondering some social stuff I’ve realized. I’ve found a lot of times women will approach me and sometimes socialize with me like I’m a dumb straight man. But when they talk to my boyfriend they’re all very comfortable around him and get into chatting very quick. My convos with some women with him in the same space have been sarcastic, and sometimes condescending. Sometimes I just don’t talk if it’s looking that way with a group of girls. For context: I was socialized in mainly male (and some toxic male) environments due to playing competitive hockey in Canada. My boyfriend on the other end was socialized in mainly female oriented spaces due to being in competitive cheer. Idk this is just something I picked up on. Maybe I give off a weird vibe.