r/queer

Can I call myself Crystal? I just adore this name , but I’m not sure , this is femme name and I identified myself as genderfluid/agender (she/him)

first of all I hope it won't come out as offensive, bc I am truly confused here😭. I am confused both on my sexuality and on whether I'm accidentally being disrespectful to some people. I am a lesbian (18) and I've only recently come out to my friends as lesbian after I fell for a sapphic girl (and was rejected). I used to identify as bi, but the label didn't seem to fit me well. i'm quite sure I don't like men. actually, I don't even feel much attracted to masc women cause they resemble men too much... I prefer femmes. but when it comes to men, I've only been attracted to men 2 times in my life, and they're both (amab) women now. the thing is... at the time when I liked them, they were still in bodies that basically were like men's bodies. I didn't seem to care about that, I only cared about the vibes. so... what's that mean ?? 😭😭😭😭 there's also one thing and I'm scared of being disrespectful or misinterpreting stuff.... basically I have some sort of obsession for femboys. it started when I was young, as a way to cope with internalized homophobia, it was the only way I wouldn't feel grossed out by the thought of having to like men. I would show a male historical c-drama actor on TV (they have long hair and no beard) and tell my mother "he's my type of man" to try make her (and also me) believe I'm not gay. Somehow, this behavior still hasn't disappeared, even after coming to terms with my sexuality. I still "celebrate" couples of femboys as if they were lesbian couples, and I repost edits of men in drag and feminine thai bl actors all the time, instead of edits of women. I also say "she's my wife" whenever a kpop idol that I like appears on screen (my fave male idols are all femboys). I sometimes ask myself whether this obsession might mean i'm bisexual, but actually, I only like them because I somehow manage to mentally translate them as women... but this is kinda creepy and I would like to have some advice. thank you

Hey y'all I am looking to join a fantasy football league! Not interested in dynasty at this point but wondered if anyone knew of a league looking for folks?

Let me know!

Hello fellow ppl!

This may be long, I’ll put a tldr at the end.

So I’ve dabbled in the kink fetish bdsm scene etc when I was younger, reckless, and in a diff state and city. I didn’t do it as safe or smart as I should have if I’m being honest and got extremely lucky with some of the encounters I had considering how little I knew. That being said I really stopped exploring that side of me a while before I got with my partner, not because of him, a lot of things happened and I just ‘cooled down’ and with him we’ve been p vanilla (by my standards). Anyways, ive been exploring and expanding my gender and sexuality once again and honestly feel the desire again. I know some areas I want to really delve into but i want to do it safely for his and my own sake. I also want to help my partner explore anything he may be wondering about as well.

I know he’s open to it but is less experienced than I am, so while we can learn together I don’t want either of us to be lost and ‘hurt’(accidentally i mean) eachother in any way. I feel wholly sure of our consent and boundaries, but bringing up what I want to try, how to try it, is what I’m struggling with. I have questions , a lot of them. We both have our own traumas and triggers that I want to be certain we navigate with care and know proper aftercare etc too.

So the bottom line is I’d love recommended subreddits that are safe informative queer kink communities… surely there must be some? I would really just like a place I could ask questions, have and read discussions, that I can share with my partner.

TLDR;
Desiring to explore the kink side of things with my partner, safely, and am seeking knowledgeable/discussion/dialogue spaces(subreddits preferably) that are queer and kink centered. Trauma informed queer kink spaces plssss

Thank you!

I identify as queer and i 100% feel that their is not queer community in the LGBTQ community i see other lgbt people online who can talk with they community online and irl easy but for me is hard because i just happen sometime that when i make a post for engage with my community who is queer i have some respond for people who are queer too but not as much like the lesbian and the bi community and that make me sad because i want to know the queer community but not alot of people identity as queer.

I have never had a Reddit account only ever looked through a couple subreddits on Google but I made an account because I’m losing my mind.

I (19f) have been extraordinarily confused on my sexuality for eight years. When I was about 11 a friend of mine came out to me as bisexual, when he started talking about how he came to that conclusion I kind of went oh shit that sounds like me. Mulled over it for a while came to the conclusion I was bisexual as well, and told no one. Time passed everyone around he had crushed, I did not, looked in to it more and came to the second conclusion that I was aro/ace because I felt the same for everyone (where I got the bi thing from) and the same was absolutely nothing.

Then when I was 14 I developed a crush on my best friend (original ik) and went back into panic mode. This didn’t last very long, but I did conclude from this that I do like girls, still haven’t said anything to anyone.

I don’t know if I like guys or not which is where my problem is coming from. I would gladly be in romantic relationship with a guy or girl, would kiss either, but the idea of sex with either is not particularly intriguing to me. However if I had a girlfriend I would do it if it made her happy, I don’t know if I would for a boyfriend.

I am pretty sure I am somewhere on the ace spectrum after all, not too concerned about where. But the girls/guys thing has been tripping me up for years. I have this little ear worm every time I think I am finally going to settle on something that tells me I don’t even like girls at all and am just putting ideas in my own head and am making things up. And again I would date a guy, but there is a point where I think I would be more willing to put myself in uncomfortable situations for a girl and not a guy.

Please help, I need advice. I feel like I am going crazy. I haven’t been able to work up the courage to talk to anyone about any of this in the almost decade it’s been on my mind and I really need some guidance.

Hi my name is C and my boyfriend J and I are trying to leave Texas in march but my plan to move to Colorado failed due to some laws that have been passed, we both make around 1,400 a month currently and have 3 cats so we definitely need to account for finances. I’m just having trouble finding a place that we can go where we will be safe we have somewhere to live and something to eat any suggestions are appreciated!

Okay so I'm starting High school in a few weeks and I really want to look more queer ! In middle school I was hiding my identity and weird the stuff I liked , I was pretending to be someone I wasn't and enden up hanging out with some really bad people :/

so I decided to try looking more queer so I can meet people like me and be myself a litle bit since I'm changing schools but I don't really know what to do for

I already have long hair and overall I think i'm androgynous ( I sometimes get called "miss" by strangers ) but my clothes are boring and I can't by anything by myself

I wonder if you have any tips ? Like some little thing to add to my bag/case or anything ?

( Btw english isn't my first language sorry if there any mistakes )

So I'm here because title, and I wanted to ask people who actually knows their way around this. I identify as a straight female right now, but I've been thinking I like being called they/them? Im not non binary though, because I don't like presenting as male. I did research things about being a demigirl, but it just has me evn more confused! :/ im currently 14, and I'd really like to figure this out. All inputs are welcome! I don't know much about this..

Okay, so you read the title. I’m usually just a lurker, sorry if I’ve done something wrong. For context, I’m Berrisexual and a Demiboy. (Berrisexual: attraction to feminine and androgynous people with slight attraction to men. Demiboy: half male half nonbinary.) Also, I was amab. And yes, my username. I made it when I was like 8 and never changed it, so I just stuck with it because I couldn’t think of anything better. (I’m trying to think of a better one) I’ve always hated it, I would just rather have an androgynous username, and I guess that’s how I found out (along with other things) that I’m a Demiboy. I came out to my parents as pan, but realized that’s incorrect. I feel like I’m not actually part of lgbtq. Also the amount of hate that Berrisexuals and Demiboys have gotten from TRANS subreddits is insane. Sorry for the long rant. Do you have any advice? Anything would be helpful. If you have any questions just ask. Thanks.

I'm horrible at titles as always. but anyway, I think I'm genderfluid though I'm still struggling... a lot. cause like I do shift from boy to girl sometimes but I also feel like both at the same time or sometimes like I just have no gender and idek if that can happen as a genderfluid person. it's really weird cause I don't feel like body dysmophia or anything... well sometimes but it's really rare and not that bad. I don't know what to do and I explained this really poorly srry.

Hi everyone!

I hope I am explaining this right.

Today I scrolled past by a reel where a person had labeled themself as she/they/he, mentioned they were a lesbian, and married to man. Their husband is a trans man and also calls himself a lesbian.

The comment section was WILD. People saying a man can’t be a lesbian, how it was rude, etc. Others said transmasc lesbians have always existed. They mentioned a lot of abbreviations I also don’t understand (“gnc trans lesbians” or “cishet man” or “afab” or “enby lesbians” and said it’s been a part of queer history.

I’ve not been out that long as a lesbian, and my queer community is pretty much non-existing, and my native language is not English, but honestly, I am just severely confused by all the abbreviations. I thought men can’t be lesbians? I always understood it as, women love women? And if you are a trans man, you are a men, so you can’t be a lesbian? Or does it mean their partner still seems them as female (which seems also a bit rude?).

Please keep in mind I am in no way trying to judge someone’s identity, I’m honestly just asking here because I tried to Google and got even MORE confused, so if anyone would explain in a language a toddler could understand? 🤡😂😭

The Instagram account was indigenousprincessdiaries.

I am super sorry if I upset anyone with my question, I really don’t mean any disrespect. I am just here to learn, and try and understand, because I want to prevent making mistakes in the future and hurting someone’s feelings!