r/lesbian

(there’s no question tag so unless you can add it I’ll just use random ones) like I’m not talking about sapphics or lesbians because they’re not exclusive to women I’m asking if there’s a wlw exclusive sexuality so it’s only cis and trans WOMEN. sorry if it sounds odd

can anyone explain to me what the identities butch and femme mean and/or tell me where i can learn more about them ive been interested in learning about them recently and ive seen a lot of people who say theyre political identities and its not just about how you dress but i havent seen anyone explain what it actually means to be butch or femme or explain where i can learn about things of the sort

I had a falling out with this girl I really liked earlier this year… I sensed things changing on her end so I tried to reach out to her. Called and texted but she wasn’t very responsive and gave me a non-answer text back so I just removed myself completely from her life. I sent a long goodbye text and everything thinking that this is the right thing to do… unfortunately there hasn’t been a single day where i haven’t been thinking about her. And it makes me rethink me leaving, I keep thinking should I have left? Did I do the right thing? All my friends say I did the right thing but I can’t seem to believe I did. The girl is very avoidant and everyone tells me she is but I only saw this side of her towards the end of it, she was pretty ok beforehand. I keep missing her and thinking about her all the time and I think about texting her again but I don’t know what to say or how to go about things. It terrifies me to think that I’ll keep feeling this way forever.

Am just sharing coz I feel like I want to share this feeling . Am a baby gay and I am talking with a girl online and she's closer then I thought and the way we are flirting idk what's next ghosting (coz I have been ghosted preety bad before) the catch is she's closer then I thought (geographically like a few hours away)but she's younger , so if I even catch feelings idk if she's being one performative teen or in actual.

Bruh the word's are a bit fumbled so ignore it if it's tuff to understand 😭

I’m a 26yo lesbian in Kentucky, I’ve literally only ever dated people I’ve met through dating apps and alas, I am over it of course. Where do lesbians hide? How does a masc lesbian (I) know a woman is into women out in the wild (my type is femmes). I would imagine this is a common issue, just wondering where thriving couples met AWAY from dating apps and how it happened. Tell me your story please so I do not give up on love.

Guys im a femme myself and I just find femmes so attractive like I just want a beautiful gf to shower with love cuz I have so much and that will let me sit on her lap and do her makeup 🙏

Hii, I feel very strange typing and posting this but I feel like there’s someone or a few people out there who are in or have been in the same boat as me!
I’m a femme but also masc, Idk terms tbf I don’t like labels much! but I feel like having a femme gf I’d HAVE to be masculine 24/7 as I only ever seem femme girls be into masc girls , never femme for femme if you get what I’m saying lol.
Like I want a femme gf I’ve only ever had celeb crushes (as I’m newly out and labelled) on more feminine girls and when I was realising if I’m gay or not I knew I was more into femmes then mascs! I don’t have an issue being the more masculine presenting gf but I would miss being girly , wearing dresses and skirts, and being held and cuddled like I would with a guy, being a little spoon, being massaged, being looked after, hair stroking etc, I’d obvi love to do all of those to a girl 100% but do girls do that to girls? Idk if I’m acting nuts but would a femme girl do all those back to me..? I feel so lost…

I hope I don’t sound rude or generalising femme and masc women and comparing them and demoralising them and us at all, I’m trying to say online I only ever seem femme women want masc women and to be more submissive and like looked after by a masc woman, and a masc woman want a femme gf to spoil and look after, but like what if I want both?? I wanna spoil a girl but also I wanna be held and have a girl stroke my hair to fall asleep, and I’ll do the same to her! Like am I asking too much??

I’m in the DMV area and recently moved to the U.S. from a queerphobic country. I’ve been finding it hard to make queer friends. I go to events sometimes, but I often feel out of place, maybe because I’m navigating multiple intersecting identities. Does anyone else feel the same way? How do you make queer friends? And if you go to events, where do you usually find them?

Hi I’m a 21 yr old cis lesbian who’s been out since I was 16. I never told my parents till about a month ago, because they are very religious and I knew they wouldn’t approve. And i was right.
Important for context, I also grew up with a very complicated relationship with my father. I used to be the favorite and when I turned 11 or 12, it was like he stopped liking me because I started forming opinions. So I spent most of my teenage years believing my father didn’t like me.

I am very confident in my lesbianism. I have never been interested in pursuing a relationship with a man, being physical with them, or connecting with them. In the past year, I met a guy much older than me, who I was able to bond with over shared music taste, desire for learning more about his point of view in life, etc. he happens to be a very nice man. Well-mannered, attentive, kind, etc. He is, however, triple my age. And he definitely is attracted to me physically, mentally, and emotionally. I have been playing along with it for a year now, but he knows I’m not interested in men. The reason why we are friends despite that is because he happens to like me as a person.

I’m a very anxious person, and I think I also may have some ocd tendencies. Lately our interactions have grown more and more endearing and intimate (not physically), and I’ve started to worry whether I’m truly a lesbian or not.
I have never felt this way towards any other man ever in my life. And I think the reason why I’m so worried about this is because of my daddy issues. The guy is triple my age. I genuinely enjoy his company and his friendship. But that’s it.

Would like some opinions.
Thank you

I want a tattoo to honor butches and my love for them (I'm not one). The ideas I have found are the labrys, a carabiner, or violet/lavender. I'm not super inspired by any of these ideas, if you guys have any others, please please please help me!

I know it’s late but I need more friends. I get moody or even needy and don’t have anyone to share that feeling with. Plus it would feel great to be able to share more than normal with. I’m 25 and just living everyday one day at a time.

Hi everyone! I'm looking for advice on how to meet more lesbians. I live in LA, but the problem is that almost every sapphic event is 21+ and I'm 18. I'd love to meet more lesbians, as friends and also in a romantic context (so much thirsting over women online...so little actually touching them.) It also sucks because I can't drive, so my mom drives me everywhere and I don't exactly love the idea of asking her to take me to these types of things. And most of my friends are straight so I can't ask them to go with me. Are dating apps my only options?? I'm dying here. Help!!

Im genuinely curious cs idk if im supposed to put wlw and wlm on stuff or if im even able to put wlw cs im bi n not fully lesbian

Hi!
My girlfriend has been having a lot of issues with neck and back pain recently. She is very masc and only wears bras with a ton of compression since she’s a bit larger chested. She has a few binders as well.
Part of the issue is that all of them are racerback and dig into her skin to provide as much flattening as she wants.

I want to find her a better alternative so she can be in a bit less pain. Have any of you all found something you prefer? I want to defer to the experts bc I’m small-chested and feminine, so I’m very out of my element!
Any advice or recs are appreciated 💕

Would yall add a fellow wlw on TikTok to get to 10k followers.
It’s 2am im bored asf, just for comments so I have smt to read thru add ur fav TikTok lesbian see if im there…