Advice please
Hi all, I’d really love some advice.
if I am being a bit of a worried mum do let me know lol! My son is 5.5 years old and started BJJ a couple of years ago. His first dojo focused mostly on games, we moved and his current dojo has a mixed 5–7 year old class with more grappling and technique work twice a week.
The challenge is that my son is naturally very soft, playful, and sweet-natured. When he first started, he barely resisted during grappling. Recently, he began fighting back a little more and even won a couple of times, which was great to see. But lately he’s gone back to mostly letting the other kids take him down without much resistance.
I’m not worried about him winning. I just want him to try and defend himself more. Some of the other kids get frustrated with him because he doesn’t engage properly, and I can understand that.
He doesn’t resist going to class or get upset, but he does sometimes tell me it’s “not his favourite thing,” which I understand because this type of sport doesn’t come naturally to him. He also tells me the other kids are stronger than him and he’s tired after school.
I absolutely want him to keep his sweet nature, but I’d also love for him to build confidence and learn to defend himself.
Do I keep encouraging him to continue? I know a little force does good. Are there things I can do at home to help build his confidence or resilience? I know he’s still very young — I just wish he had a little more fire in his belly. Do sweet natured boys who keep going to BJJ eventually gain more confidence as they get older? Should we find another type of self defence or just let him be.
thank you x