Mom's Fiancé's family Is excluding Me from Family events and Cold towards me
My dad died in an accident when i was around 8, we lived in germany then. two years after that me and my mom moved to madrid cause thats where shes from. she took care of me so good after he died, like she is honestly the strongest person i know, shes protective but also really soft with me. i love her so much, I'm 15M for the context
Anyway around 5 years ago she started seeing someone, this Man who was actually an old friend of hers and also a client for her work. i didnt even know they were dating until 3 years ago when she introduced him to me at dinner. i was honestly shocked, like it never even occurred to me that she'd date again. before that dinner id seen him at our place like 2-3 times and she just said he was a friend Hes rich. like actually wealthy. hes divorced with 2 teenage kids who mostly live with their mom
At first it was just me tagging along to dinners or short trips when they wanted to include his kids too, but a lot of the time she'd just drop me at her friends place instead, she has this group of 4 best friends who are basically aunts to me so it was never a big deal, i like them a lot Then slowly they started trying to blend our families more. his kids were never nice to me honestly, from the start. they have nicer clothes, better stuff, and yeah i noticed the difference but i had my own friends so whatever, didnt bother me that much
2 years ago we went to switzerland for christmas to meet his family. his mom, sister, brother, their spouses, kids. i said hi to everyone, was polite. his brother and his wife were actually really sweet to me but everyone else was cold. that night everyone was doing christmas stuff together and i just sat there alone. we stayed over and my mom slept in a different part of the house and i slept alone on a different floor. that was the first time i felt like something was really off
Over the last 2 years ive seen them like 8-10 more times and its the same thing every time, cold shoulder from his mom and sister especially, but they are SO warm to my mom. they include her in everything
About 6 months ago there was a family event and after, they did a family photoshoot. i was sitting outside. they didnt invite me. they thought i didnt notice but i did. my mom was basically in the center of the photo. when i told her that night she just said "it was just a photoshoot, we can do one together if you want" and i mean. it still hurt. like no matter what im not really their family to them 3 months ago they got engaged, wedding is in september. before she said yes she actually asked me if i was okay with it, which meant a lot, and i said yes cause i do love her and i want her happy
Its a big wedding, like 3 days, planning started since june. and since june ive barely spent 20 days total with my mom. she's always with him and his family now
I found out his kids have been involved in choosing stuff for the wedding, even the destination. they hosted a dinner for his friends and family and her friends and i wasnt invited. they did a trip with his family last month, not invited. his sisters birthday/anniversary thing, big event, my mom went, i wasnt invited Its not like she completely ignores me, we did go on a trip together, we watched spain play in the world cup together just us two and it was honestly one of the best days ive had with her this year. so its not like she doesnt care but right now shes in cadiz with his family and last night i called her about something and his sister picked up the phone and said "shes busy ill have her call you later." she never called back. i cried last night, i felt so stupid for crying but i did
Ive told my mom how i feel before. i dont even blame her for a lot of it, i think she genuinely feels stuck sometimes, like she cant fix how his family treats me
But if this is how its going right before the wedding, i honestly dont know what my relationship with her is gonna look like after. and i already dont really have one with him
So I'm Thinking to Tell My Mom To Cancel the wedding until everything is sort out otherwise She will have No longer Relationship With Me