Adopted rescue has bonded hard with my partner but not me. Help?
We adopted a 7 month old Chihuahua mix about 10 days ago from a foster rescue and overall he's made really great progress, but we're dealing with a pretty classic one-person attachment situation and I'd love some advice.
He has completely latched onto my partner. Follows him everywhere, wants to be near him at all times, the whole thing. With me, it's a different story, he'll come near me when I have treats or food, and just recently started playing with me a little, but only when my partner is also in the room. He's generally a bit skittish and cautious, though honestly considering he's only been here 10 days the progress has been noticeable.
The harder part is the separation anxiety when my partner leaves. My partner works hybrid and I'm fully remote, so there are days where it's just me and the dog at home. Every time my partner leaves, he cries, whines, and paces back and forth through the whole house looking for him. In the beginning he wasn't really seeking comfort from me at all during these moments, just full panic mode. But in the last couple of days he's actually been coming to me and whining while I hold him, which feels like progress even if he's still upset.
He also tends to settle down on his own after noon and will just hang out near me, as long as I’m sitting at my desk. It seems like any time I go to the kitchen, living room, etc he starts sort of panicking again. He almost also does better in the crate if I have to leave for an hour. I also haven’t seen him hang out by himself ever, is always where we are.
I've been trying to stay calm when he's crying and pacing, not chasing after him or over-comforting him, while also being available when he comes to me. But I'm not totally sure I'm handling it the right way.
A few questions:
- Is this kind of single-person attachment common with Chihuahua mixes?
- Does it typically get better with time and consistency?
- Any specific tips for helping him feel safe with both of us equally?
Any advice from people who've been through this would mean a lot. He's a little guy with a big history and we really want to get this right for him.