I don't know what to do (pls don't delete)
Just a little rant tbh. I am a dropper and I scored 98.6%ile in mains one and it plummeted in mains 2. 97.3 something. I took a drop at 95%ile last year and I took a drop hoping iss saal I'll get 99.5+ because people literally do that in 2 years and while I had 3 I couldn't even get close to it. I feel so left behind and just stupid frankly. Because so many people do it and so could have I had but I always made one mistake or the other, and now that these 3 years of daily studying comes to an end the day after tmr, it just feels sick being this person who had 3 years for himself but still hasn't completed his syllabus yet. I hate the fact I actually loved science and hence all I did for the first 2 years was maths and physics because those were the ones I actually liked. Adv 2025 me I couldn't clear chem cutoff. it just feels dumb, and helpless. I always told myself that once im done with adv i'll be a different person and focus on other aspects of life but what if this guilt consumes me because I really did try and I really did always willingly want a good college. I chose to do this. I chose to do science. and I don't have anyone to vent this to so here goes some digital footprint I guess. (sry if this is dramatic tbh)