u/Apart_Water2184

For four years I poured my heart and soul, blood, sweat and tears into turning a program around. The program and room I walked into was a hoarding situation with zero systems in place, zero curriculum, and a ton of junk. Everywhere.
Naively, I thought this would be my job for a long time to come and so the investment of labor felt worth it. I rolled up my sleeves and got to work. Four years later, the room is functional, clean, systems are in place, there is a solid curriculum, students are achieving at a much higher level and the program is taking shape….so of course this is the year that - after the district was facing state receivership- that they decided to take a hack saw to their teaching staff (mind you, they did not dare downsize the disproportionately huge DO). I got a RIF notice and was laid off.
I am so angry and sad that I am having a hard time functioning. I am struggling not to break down sobbing in the middle of my classes, on the way to work, on the way home from work. I wake up in the middle of the night crying in my sleep.
This was my dream job. I would literally give anything to stay. I worked so hard to create a program that was worth something and that would provide students with a quality education. And then I was thrown away like it was nothing. My RIF notice was given to me IN THE MIDDLE OF ONE OF MY CLASSES IN FRONT OF EVERYONE. And then I was expected to turn around and go right back to teaching. No professional respect or courtesy that this was one of the most devastating professional events of my career.
I want to fight back, but I know that at the end of the day it is pointless. The union is a political entity that does very little for individuals and, at least in our district, seems to do very little for teachers as a whole…but that’s a whole other can of worms.
I just cannot take it anymore and I want to do something else, but I’ve been teaching for over a decade and have invested so much into this career path. I hate how powerless I feel and I am so gd angry that it’s eating me up.
Advice??????