I am a 23F and I have about two years of experience working as a daycare worker. The last year of working as a daycare worker was probably the most stressful period of my life. I don’t want to go into specifics,but it was usual mix of components (unsupportive management, lack of staff and undisciplined children). I left the job on the last day of the school year and I have been working as an online TA.
However, this current position has low hours, pays monthly and no benefits. This is a major concern and I’ve been actively looking for a job.
I recently applied and got an interview for a TA position at an Infant-Pre-K school. I was able to try out the position and see if it was the right position for me. Unfortunately, I started to have the same feeling of tightness in my chest and in my throat once I entered the classroom. The lights, the music, the routine. It triggered me. I got so overwhelmed so quickly.
Thing is, the children gravitated towards me. I’m not sure why, but they became super comfortable with me. They sat on my lap, hugged me and played with my necklace. For some reason, children seem to like me a lot.
And don’t get me wrong, I love them so so so much. I remember dreaming about my daycare children and missing them. However, my past experiences in classroom setting have affected how I view them. Now, I get overwhelmed about them getting hurt and having to keep them safe 24/7. My old daycare management would make me feel like I couldn’t make one mistake and would have no consideration towards my wellbeing. I was burned out and my confidence was trashed.
I guess this is silly for me to ask, but should I give it a second chance? Should I take this as a signal to not accept the job? My trial was only for one day and I need to give an answer by tomorrow. I’m also studying on the side to become an occupational therapist. Note: I also struggle with anxiety and depression.
Thank you for your help! Have a blessed day!