Hi everyone,
I 29F finished treatment for PMBCL with R-EPOCH and had a clean end-of-treatment scan (Deauville 2), which I know is objectively really positive news. But instead of feeling relieved, I’ve become increasingly fixated on the risk of treatment-related secondary cancers, especially t-MDS or t-AML from chemotherapy exposure.
I know these risks are considered relatively uncommon, but reading about them has really gotten into my head. It feels hard to fully celebrate remission when my brain immediately jumps to “what if the treatment that saved me causes something worse in the next couple years" what if I only have a few years to live because of this?
For anyone else who had R-EPOCH or other intensive chemo regimens, did you struggle with this fear? How did you cope with the uncertainty and hyper-awareness around blood counts, symptoms, and long-term risks?
Did this anxiety get better with time?
Not looking for medical advice, mostly hoping to hear from others who have dealt with similar fears after treatment and how you mentally moved forward.