u/AuzPot18

My Gran is apparently isn't Indigenous.. of Australia. She's Sri Lankan Indigenous.

That's fine. That's some ties I didn't have a clue about.

But my GRANDPA'S SIDE?!!! Black black with proof of Indigenous identity. Wtf. And this bitch.. [my mother] didn't tell me.

We throwin hands y'all. [Jokes but STILLLLLLL]

I be here thinking we didn't have much proof, if any, and I'm being told just now at twenty fucking two... that there is proof. Imma crash out.

The poll only allows 6 sections, which is personally ridiculous... otherwise, this would've been PERFECT!!

Those unsure of where your tribe resides, you can read below of where said region is located based on English language;

Mentioned Above;

• Nauo: Port Lincon and surrounds, spanning from Cape Radstock to near Darke Peak and down to the coast, including Port Lincoln, Coffin Bay, and Elliston.

• Anangu: Central Australia.

• Yolngu: North-East Arnhem Land.

• Koori/Koorie: NSW and Victoria.

• Murri: Queensland and north-west NSW.

Not Mentioned in Poll;

• Nunga: South Australia.

• Palawa: Tasmania.

• Yamaji/Barna: Murchison region of WA.

• Biik: Woiwurrung language term for Melbourne.

. . .

I've also included "Nauo" as an option as it's sitting on my mind atm wandering if there are others from that tribe.. considering how little left there were of them.

You can specify what tribe specifically you are if you so choose to in the comments.

*This is more of a curiosity thing. Nothing about this will be documented online anywhere for privacy of those in Reddit group.*

View Poll

I'm Nauo. My language is practically dead. But of course... we have German folk recalibrating it (i think that's the wrong word, yall...), we only have maybe 5 words confirmed. Turns out only 7 of my people had survived the shit the white folk did...

So I was wondering if there were anyone else in my shoes, wanting to learn your language but finding out it's basically dead...

Or even those who have a full language to learn. I don't know many who try around my area. It'd be awesome to know if y'all do?

*[Before continuing, I need to mention that any sort of self harming or related in such is not mentioned and wasn't mentioned in the post beforehand, do NOT flag me for something like that again. I'm sick of writing an entire post as long as the height of Uluru just for it to be taken down]*

. . .

Hey y'all, pale skinned Nauo here.

Unfortunately, I need some major help, like... I guess you can say it's mental health and such. Idk what category to put racism and 'personal race acceptance issues' in.

I've had a handful of racist comments towards me from a wide range of ages. First one, I distinctly remember being at Grade 3, doing the paper NAPLAN, back when it was paper instead of online. Boy beside me was a darker skinned black fella, I thought he was cool. I think I liked him at the time, but to say the least... that got *[SHATTERED]* after his behaviour. There's a section on the NAPLAN, if you're unsure, asking if you're Aboriginal, Torres Strait Islander, or Neither. I circled Aboriginal, obviously, because I am. This mtf was screaming me, saying I'm a liar, not Aboriginal, too white to be Aboriginal, etc. Blah blah blah...

The teacher had to break us apart because it got quite heated... I was quite violent as a kid.. still am as an adult but obviously controlled. He did end up spreading the interaction across the entire school, twisting it, obviously. Making me seem like the insane one. All that bullshit. I ended up leaving that school, moving an hour and a half away. I'm glad it didn't follow me. That's for sure. And I'm extremely proud to know my bestie at the time took my side. Because she was and probably still is amazing.

But to say the least... I've had more racist interactions further down the line. From primary to high school to being an adult. Even been called a Gubbah. I didn't know what it meant until recently after reading it in MANY posts in this Reddit group... it is a NASTY word to call someone who doesn't identify as white or European/English.

I've been called "white" on here too VERY recently, you know I'm talking to you mtf(s), gtfo. All because I didn't know a specific word was a slur to us. It was used a lot around me, and I thought it was normal. So fuck off with that racist shit. I won't he using it anymore, not even mentioning it. Ifyk what I said, then you know what I said, and we'll leave it as that.

At home, I had my stepdad, who was a pure white man, say things like if his race *[the British]* didn't come to Australia, we wouldn't have what we have today... and obviously, I'm not an idiot. I'd say we didn't fucking need it. Which we didn't. He was racist, and his brother was too. Racism was everywhere for me. My bully in the primary school I moved to, who was VISIBLY Indigenous, and gorgeous... 👀 I'll admit it... he heard about it was taken aback by how much shit I was going through as a white indigenous, stopped bullying, actually.

As a kid, I always wanted to be with an Aboriginal man. I didn't care for skin because that would make me a hypocrite... I ended up getting with one. Unfortunately, we didn't work out for irrelevant reasons on his behalf... his sister and cousin were racist assholes... even it being subtle, I notice. They're dumbasses to say the least. The cousins mother literally loved me... which makes me wonder what the cousins father was like.

But the sister was just a bitch from the start. But this boy was absolutely amazing. We put mud on each other as if we were doing painting... ofc.. young people being young. Not fully understanding what the body paint was actually meant to be used for. It's still cute, though. His father taught me things of Aboriginal culture. His Kangaroo was fucking amazing. I helped the guy soften beeswax for his didgees, no, I didn't touch them... okay once, but that's when I got told why I want allowed to touch em as a woman. 💀

It's unfortunate that we didn't work out. That's for sure.

I ended up being with a white man... I love him dearly. But he doesn't understand a SINGLE THING of the Indigenous. I say something y'all would understand, and he'd be so fucking confused. I'd try to find a way to explain, but it just doesn't get through his thick skull to be able to reach his brain.

We've had a son together, about to have another bubba in the first week of June. Whitest baby I have fucking ever seen that wasn't American or British...

I love my son and the bubba coming, no I don't find out the genders.

But that feeling in the back of my heart aches... I wanted to be with a black boy. Not just any black boy... a black boy who was connected to the land and played the didgee... was able to teach me more of our land since I wasn't around anyone who could until I was 14, who I ended up having to let go of at 17. Not enough time for me to learn things... I'm a slow learner. I LOVEEEEE this man. He's a MANNNNNN like... ifyk.. yk. He does what a man should. And he perfects it. Every single fucking day. Having to deal with my bullshit also.. he deserves a more than just a medal... like. 💀

Even an Indigenous man who appeared white and checked all the boxes above... I'd be happy with that because, to me, skin doesn't matter. I like the term I hear from African - Americans; "Percentage doesn't count. It's the heritage that matters."

But sometimes I sit in the dark at 03:00 *[morning]* when we're meant to be asleep and I can't stop thinking of what I've always wanted as a kid... and the fact that younger me would be proud of me for 1. Being alive... but also because I have a family, I've had kids. But she'd ask why I wasn't with *[that]* black boy, nicknamed "milk-man" for some reason... *[Please laugh at that nickname... it is truly amazing how someone can choose a nickname for themselves and roll with it like he did]* Or at least another black man. All this eats me alive because I love this man... but deep down, it feels wrong to be with him. And I won't tell him this either... I can't. If we didn't have kids, oh man, I would've already. But bc there are kids involved, I'd feel like a typical white bitch. No offence to them... but they fr be leaving their partners for stupid reasons... *[sometimes the reason be genuinely making me tweek bc of how the man was treating said woman, but I'm mainly talking about them white women who leave bc they want a different man or... idk I can't think of many. They be coming up with wild shit]*

I don't want to leave him. Because we are healthy. We love each other. We are actually engaged.. like. Fuck. I'm planning the wedding and shit... and also trying to plan an Indigenous Ceremony in Port Lincoln or somewhere near for me to be able to feel more Indigenous and more connected to my people and my land.

I also HATE my skin. Even my features... as a kid, I looked a bit more Indigenous. My nose was bigger, and my face was fuller. Etc. Parents were able to ask my Mom if I was because I looked a little Indigenous. Now, as an adult... I look like a pure coloniser... I'm racist towards myself. Which is too difficult for me to explain. I don't know the right words to be able to explain it. The only thing I can say to *["explain"]* it is,

*["I'm too white. I'm not like them. I can't be like them."]*

It's been hard lately. I absolutely fell in love with myself at 18.. it took me so many years to learn self-love, and then it went out the window last year around my 21st birthday in November after remembering some things like the racism... And unfortunately, I've gained hate of some kind, sort've in a racist form, towards white people... and idk where tf that came from... that's yet ANOTHER issue I have on hand.

I don't know what I'm seeking here in this post... but I just needed to ask for some advice or any kind before I went insane.

Love y'all. Stay black and deadly! xoxo 🖤💛❤️

*[DO NOT... flag this again- I'll lose my mind. And please, no need to send me links and stuff to help lines... I don't like them. They don't help me. Especially those who are only mobile call interactions... like no. I'm good. The whole point of texting on here is to take my time and fix mistakes in my own slow ass process... I feel rushed when talking in person or on the phone.]*

Hey y'all, white nga here.

Unfortunately, I need some major help, like... I guess you can say it's mental health and such. Idk what category to put it in.

I've had a handful of racist comments towards me from a wide range of ages. First one, I distinctly remember being at Grade 3, doing the paper NAPLAN, back when it was paper instead of online. Boy beside me was a darker skinned black fella, I thought he was cool. I think I liked him at the time, but to say the least... that got *SHATTERED* after his behaviour. There's a section on the NAPLAN, if you're unsure, asking if you're Aboriginal, Torres Strait Islander, or Neither. I circled Aboriginal, obviously, because I am. This mtf was screamin me, saying I'm a liar, not Aboriginal, too white to be Aboriginal, etc. Blah blah blah...

The teacher had to break us apart because it got quite heated... I was quite violent as a kid.. still am as an adult but obviously controlled. He did end up spreading the interaction across the entire school, twisting it, obviously. Making me seem like the insane one. All that bullshit. I ended up leaving that school, moving an hour and a half away. I'm glad it didn't follow me. That's for sure. And I'm extremely proud to know my bestie at the time took my side. Because she was and probably still is amazing.

But to say the least... I've had more racist interactions further down the line. From primary to high school to being an adult.

At home, I had my stepdad, who was a pure white man, say things like if his race [the British] didn't come to Australia, we wouldn't have what we have today... and obviously, I'm not an idiot. I'd say we didn't fucking need it. Which we didn't. He was racist, and his brother was too. Racism was everywhere for me. The bully in primary, who was Indigenous, heard about it was taken aback by how much shit I was going through as a white indigenous, stopped bullying, actually.

As a kid, I always wanted to be with an Aboriginal man. I didn't care for skin because that would make me a hypocrite... I was with one. Unfortunately, we didn't work out for irrelevant reasons on his behalf... his sister and cousin were racist assholes... even it being subtle, I notice. They're dumbasses to say the least. The cousins mother literally loved me... which makes me wonder what the cousins father was like.

But the sister was just a bitch from the start. But this boy was absolutely amazing. We put mud on each other as if we were doing painting... ofc.. young people being young. Not fully understanding what the body paint was actually meant to be used for. It's still cute, though. His father taught me things of Aboriginal culture. His Kangaroo was fucking amazing. I helped the guy soften beeswax for his didgees, no, I didn't touch them... okay once, but that's when I got told why I want allowed to touch em as a woman. 💀

It's unfortunate that we didn't work out. That's for sure.

I ended up being with a white man... I love him dearly. But he doesn't understand a SINGLE THING of the indigenous. I say something y'all would understand, and he'd be so fucking confused. I'd try to find a way to explain, but it just doesn't get through his thick skull to be able to reach his brain.

We've had a son together, about to have another one in the first week of June. Whitest baby I have fucking ever seen that wasn't American or British...

I love my son and the bubba coming, no I don't find out the genders.

But that feeling in the back of my heart aches... I wanted to be with a black boy. Not just any black boy... a black boy who was connected to the land and played the didgee... was able to teach me more of our land since I wasn't around anyone who could until I was 14, who I ended up having to let go of at 17. Not enough time for me to learn things... I'm a slow learner. I LOVEEEEE this man. He's a MANNNNNN like... ifyk.. yk. He does what a man should. And he perfects it. Every single fucking day. Having to deal with my bullshit also.. he deserves a more than just a medal... like. 💀

But sometimes I sit in the dark at 3am when we're meant to be asleep and I can't stop thinking of what I've always wanted as a kid... and the fact that younger me would be proud of me for 1. Being alive... but also because I have a family, I've had kids. But she'd ask why I wasn't with *that* black boy, nicknamed "milk-man" for some reason... Or at least another black man. All this eats me alive because I love this man... but deep down, it feels wrong to be with him. And I won't tell him this either... I can't. If we didn't have kids, oh man, I would've already. But bc there are kids involved, I'd feel like a typical white bitch. No offence to them... but they fr be leaving their partners for stupid reasons... [sometimes the reason be genuinely making me tweek bc of how the man was treating said woman, but I'm mainly talking about them white women who leave bc they want a different man or... idk I can't think of many. They be coming up with wild shit]

I don't want to leave him. Because we are healthy. We love each other. We are actually engaged.. like. Fuck. I'm planning the wedding and shit... and also trying to plan an Indigenous Ceremony in Port Lincoln or somewhere near for me to be able to feel more Indigenous and more connected to my people and my land.

I also HATE my skin. Even my features... as a kid, I looked a bit more Indigenous. My nose was bigger, and my face was fuller. Etc. Parents were able to ask my Mom if I was because I looked a little Indigenous. Now, as an adult... I look like a pure coloniser... I'm racist towards myself. Which is too difficult for me to explain. I don't know the right words to be able to explain it. The only thing I can say to *"explain"* it is,

*"I'm too white. I'm not like them. I can't be like them."*

It's been hard lately. I absolutely fell in love with myself at 18.. it took me so many years to learn self-love, and then it went out the window last year around my 21st birthday in November. And unfortunately, I've gained hate of some kind towards white people... and idk where tf that came from... that's yet ANOTHER issue I have on hand.

I don't know what I'm seeking here in this post... but I just needed to mention it before I went insane and did something stupid. And unfortunately, we all know what *"stupid"* means... And I haven't felt that way since I was 17... all this hard work of self loving went through the window and fell into horse shit.

Love y'all. Stay black and deadly! xoxo 🖤💛❤️