Bub Carrington - names Bub, bub. But don’t call me Bub if I don’t know you. Got that, bub? Now pass me the rock, chief! Don’t call me chief, either, or I’ll give you a D.C. Surprise. Why are you still here?!
Tex Antoine - Badboy weatherman pioneer and Vincent Price lookalike. My two passions - lying about the weather and lying about being Vincent Price. Scored lots of free blow doing both.
Les Rogoff - you want a computer? I got computers. Come get yourself a genuine Appel Markbook now while supplies last! I’ll give you a discount if you let me show you MORE Rogoff. No refunds.
English Gardner - American athlete. Not a gardener. Though I do run a specialty shop downtown that sells adult-themed lawn decorations. Half off nude lawn gnomes this week! Just the male ones.