How do corporate folks cope with the dull, meaningless drudgery of a corporate career?
I'm 34 years old and have been working in corporate healthcare administration for about 6 years now. I feel like I'm nearing the end of my rope. I used to be such a lively, passionate, driven person and I barely recognize the shell of a human I am now.
I feel so whiny for feeling this way because I have a relatively stable position with a 6 figure income, I've been promoted twice in my 6 years with the company, I work remote, and my workload is completely manageable. I'm able to log off by 5:00pm about 98% of the workdays a year and I honestly rarely have even close to a full, door-to-door 8 hours of work to do a day.
What's starting to kill me (or maybe what already has) is the exhaustion of trying to "fake it" while slogging on through the robotic monotony. My corporate world is fake. Everything is "urgent" and it feels absolutely pathetic to play along and act like it's real when there are no tangible real-life consequences to my powerpoint deck being late. My team is meant to do a lot of strategic planning and implementation and I can't help but to feel that our entire purpose is to be a bunch of annoying busybodies who buzz around, make up problems, and insert ourselves to make up solutions. When I sit in on team meetings where people are having active discussions and trying to collaboratively problem solve, I feel like an insane person that a single person in the room cares enough to engage in the conversation at all. And that is so not me!!! I love being engaged and passionate; I want to work hard and have a career that I actually give a part of myself to. I'm not someone who wants work to "just be a paycheck" for me.
I've started completely numbing myself during the day to get by. I blankly stare at my phone watching more Reels than a person should be able to; I play more repetitive rounds of Fortnite than is healthy, and I have a constant stream of Real Housewives on in the background. By the time my day ends, I have no energy to socialize, no energy to date, barely enough energy to get myself to the gym and home and get some food in my system. I miss my joie de vivre and my spirit and I want to spend some more time tending to those aspects of my life, but I start and end my day feeling like I've lost myself so substantially throughout my day that I just don't have it in me anymore.
Ultimately, I'm trying to make a career change and go into the nursing field. I'd much rather be engaged in harder work if it means being in person, interacting with real people and tending to actual problems that have legitimate impact.
My question to you all is - How do you do it? How do you keep sane while living as a shell of your true self in the corporate world? Even if I do make a career shift into nursing, it won't start until at least Summer 2027. I'm so desperate for anything that can keep me sane and help me get my spirit back in the meantime.