Clip Roulette w/ Dictators, Demons and Democracy (Episode #571)

Kmele is absent. The bottle is doing its best for the Moynihan/Welch duo.

• Greetings…oh, fuck
• Welch has a bone to pick with Ben Dreyfuss
• Clip Roulette
• Tucker and the Demon Bomb
• Jason Arday, martyr?
• The Jonah Lehrer comparison
• The Samantha Power mic disaster
• Fuck you Joaquin
• John Mearsheimer, Stephen F. Cohen and the Russian apologists
• Ukraine didn’t go away
• Trump, Kim Jong-un and the South Korea war games
• Midterm Madness / Polymarket, wha happen?
• Median Strategies and the fake poll
• Adam Bonica, Marc Elias and scamming the elderly
• Is Cuba a dictatorship? Apparently a difficult question
• The Padilla Affair / Slobo Googling
• Theft as a “biological need”
• Chocolate City
• Stay tuned for más Moynihan Report

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The Politics of Pretending (Episode #570)

Hasan Piker, the DSA, AOC, Jason Arday, Francesca Hong, and miscellaneous lunacy

• Kmele is out of Adderall
• Did anybody actually watch this Tucker and Hunter interview?
• “Montrosity” and other difficult words
• The adventures of Proximity Hong
• The curious case of Jason Arday
• Is there any chance Jesse Singal is racist?
• AOC discovers Woke 1.0 was crazy
• Shane Gillis and the conspiracy of enforcing things nobody believed
• Thank you, Thom Tillis. Also, fuck you.
• Funding the other side’s whackos
• Mamdani declares war on Amazon
• A general rent strike. Over one cockroach.
• David Remnick meets the DSA
• Kmele gets swarmed by the Hasan bots
• So, how great was Mao?
• Midterm Madness and the 2028 Democratic sweepstakes
• Clip Roulette
• Kmele tries to explain himself. It does not help.
• Can America get at least a busted Boris Johnson?

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A Man of 1989 (w/ David Frum) #569

We’re joined by The Atlantic’s David Frum for a wide-ranging conversation about Trumpism, the Democratic left, immigration, political memory, and what became of American conservatism.

• a pre-obit for the esteemed David Frum
• involuntarily unionized at The Atlantic
• spy novels, bureaucrats and expense reports
• turning down Bill Buckley’s golden ticket
• prosperity, security and how quickly it can all disappear
• Frum is forever a man of 1989
• God makes you lucky, then convinces you you’re smart
• Tucker Carlson was always capable of many things
• falling flat on your back isn’t progress
• the Michigan Senate choice from hell
• Democrats discover Trump’s permission structure
• Midterm Madness in Michigan
• the polling industry has a phone problem
• politics for people who can afford to lose
• “I saw you coming so I could stop you”
• immigration restriction without the Trumpism
• fascism has the better sales pitch than communism
• what Donald Trump loves besides himself
• the conservative future Frum got very wrong and other reflections

Watch/Listen On:

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• Apple Podcasts
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The Fifth Gets a Substitute Teacher (w/ Jesse Singal) #568

No one has thought any of this through

Jesse Singal of Blocked and Reported and Singal-Minded fills Michael Moynihan’s special diabetic chair to discuss Fauci’s diaries, broken institutions, runaway AI, LeBron and Mamdani Mart.

• Moynihan out, Jesse Singal in
• Barry Weiss hired everyone except Jesse
• The Prince of Science re-enrages everyone (or at least Rand Paul)
• Gell-Mann amnesia and the collapse of institutional trust
• The media needed a COVID daddy
• An OpenAI model escaped the sandbox
• The analogy of the paperclip machine and how it consumed the universe
• Cambridge protected alleged plagiarist Jason Arday
• Midterm Madness, Ohio governor race version
• Kmele feels that LeBron will never love him but he doesn’t want to talk about it
• Three grown men relived their greatest pickup games
• Kmele wanted the gods back in The Odyssey
• Mamdani Mart promised groceries at 30 percent off
• Billy Bob Thornton returns from hell in White Knight (a Kmele Foster joint)
• Nazi dinosaurs stalked Jews through Schindler’s Park
• Jesse discovered second-order effects
• Not every strange obsession with Israel was antisemitism
• Rent stabilization has worked great for millionaires
• No French goodbye for Kmele

Watch/Listen On:

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• YouTube
• Spotify
• Apple Podcasts

I Don’t Make Mistakes Anymore. They’re Just Lies (w/ Chris Cuomo) #567

We're joined by Chris Cuomo, anchor of NewsNation’s CUOMO.

We talk about what the media still gets wrong about Trump, what losing CNN did to him, and why he believes more political violence is coming.

• Kmele sizes Chris up and… is this podcast 10% gay?
• From Fox, to ABC, to CNN
• Did the media make Trump president?
• Celebrity, discontent and everything the media missed
• Being right about what’s wrong
• The duopoly is killing us. DSA isn’t helping.
• Cuomo, Cuomo and Cuomo Crime Time
• Scott Jennings, JD Vance and the rewards of picking a side
• The media discovers capital-T Truth and loses its curiosity
• Trump’s corruption and the limits of whataboutism
• Mario Cuomo should have worn a toga
• Voters don’t want the flaws. They want the disruption.
• There will be more political violence
• Matt Lauer crosses the street to express his condolences
• Broadcasting from the basement and losing an identity
• Illegal immigration and its convenient distortions
• Tucker, Fredo and Mike Tyson
• Kmele can take Joe Rogan. Chris has notes.
• AOC gets savvier; Kmele would prefer an accounting
• I don’t make mistakes anymore. They’re just lies
• COVID couldn’t transcend the culture war
• Midterm Madness
• the first presidential candidates that Matt Welch, Chris Cuomo, and Kmele voted for
• Andrew Cuomo and the outsider problem

Watch / Listen On:

• Substack
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• Apple Podcasts
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There Is No They - #566

The Iran Deal Is Dead. The War Is Back

-The many sins of fattie John J. Cafaro

-The Moynihan Report will return

-Hand jobs and the intellectual life of West Hollywood

-Release the Welch canceled-songs playlist

-The Iran deal is dead. The war is back.

-Why did Iran blow it up? Why does a dog lick his balls?

-Air power has never toppled a regime

-The anti-globalists discover the Strait of Hormuz

-Israel’s secret Ahmadinejad project

-In partial defense of the late Lindsey Graham

-Politics is gross. Stop loving politicians.

-Fellating is best done behind closed doors

-“There is no they. There is only we. And we usually don’t know what the fuck we’re doing.”

-Midterm Madness comes to Michigan

-Haley Stevens brings a little bit of stick-it-to-’em

-Is this DSA thing real?

-Colorado nominates a man who first killed at seven (he thinks)

-Two fatal ICE shootings in two weeks

-Ann Widdecombe is murdered. Britain shrugs.

-Kmele attempts the Caitlin Clark/data center crossover. It does not land.

Are We the Baddies? The Graham Platner Reckoning (w/ Kat Rosenfield) - #565

Rape Allegations Rock the Maine Senate Race

The great Kat Rosenfield joins us to discuss the ongoing fallout from rape allegations against Maine U.S. Senate candidate Graham Platner published Monday by Politico.

When you’re a star, they let you mispronounce their name.

• The Fifth Column (whiskey) sells out!
• America’s birthday month
• Loathing Graham Platner before it was cool
• The least weird thing about Platner
• The Times is on it
• A working class hero is something to be
• About that beard
• The flaws are a feature, not a bug
• We all know a guy like this
• Christine Blasey Ford enters the chat •Michael Tracey exists
• Kmele expresses skepticism •It’s not consensual, it’s DiGiorno •On second thought, let’s not play the Fuentes clip
• Michell Goldberg’s mea culpa
• Fruit baskets
• Midterm Madness… the Graham Platner edition
• Stephen King for senate?
• Missing Moynihan

Watch/Listen On:

• Substack
• YouTube
• Apple Podcasts
• Spotify

The Revolution Will Be Staffed by PhDs (w/co-host Peter Meijer) - #564

Former Congressman Peter Meijer (R-MI) sits in for Matt Welch for Mamdani-world talk, factory-job nostalgia, Colorado’s DSA insurgency, and the bipartisan fringe romance of blowing things up.

• The Fifth Column whiskey racket begins
• Matt moves during a heat wave… Peter Meijer reports for duty
• Meijer, class traitor, explains the pied-à-terre tax
• Mayor Mamdani balances the budget, if you ignore the bailout
• Kmele gets Hayek’d
• Machine politics was bad, but graduate student politics is worse.
• Bannon’s old Leninist fantasy, now available in DSA packaging
• Kamala Harris genuflects toward Mamdani-world
• MAGA wants the factories back. The robots have other ideas.
• Ro Khanna’s children: landed gentry
• Midterm Madness, Rocky Mountain High
• Melat Kiros justifies 9/11
• Scott Wiener gets yelled at for insufficient revolutionary fervor
• Stalinism, but make it customer-facing
• The revolution will be staffed by PhD candidates
• Speaking of revolution: happy birthday, America

Watch/Listen On:

• Substack
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• Apple Podcasts
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The Cadres and the Cabal (#563)

The revolution arrives badly explained, while Dialog gets promoted from conference to cabal.

• Welch enters his Charles Nelson Reilly era
• Laura Branigan, Happy Mondays, and songs you didn’t know were covers
• Puerto Rico’s revenge
• The cadres are closing in
• Reihan Salam and Larry Flynt
• DAC hits the media circuit and refuses to answer the easiest question in politics
• Aber Kawas explains 9/11, in a Miss South Carolina sort of way
• Vaporware word clouds masquerading as policy
• No borders, no prisons, no TSA PreCheck… no joke
• Nationalizing airlines, abolishing comfort, and calling it justice
• Mamdani’s machine, the DSA bench, and the Democratic Party’s growing nervous breakdown
• Polymarket vs. the polls
• The internet is not a socialist invention, no matter how hard socialists try
• Senate Republicans discover Trump skepticism several years too late
• The SAVE Act tantrum and the incredible courage of people who already lost
• Tucker, Trump, Iran, inflation, and the limits of MAGA obedience
• Peter Thiel’s terrifying secret network of people talking at conferences
• Moynihan goes to Dialog and accidentally joins the Illuminati
• Kmele reports back from the alleged cabal
• Bohemian Grove was cooler because at least you had to break in

Watch/Listen On:

• Substack
• Youtube
• Apple Podcasts
• Spotify

The Iran Deal Is Bad and Everyone Is Stupid (#562)

JD to Israel: “Have you said thank you even once?”

• Kmele debuts his Sebastian Bach beach jeans
• The Iran deal is like the JCPOA, but a lot worse
• Lebanon sneaks into a U.S.-Iran deal
• Strait of Hormuz, 60-day promises, and negotiating with hostage-takers
• Why can’t the hawks ever learn?
• Ukraine brings the war home to Russia
• Drones, oil refineries, and the new cost of war
• Europe wakes up… sort of
• Meloni jabs her digits at Trump
• Polymarket checks the damage in Israeli politics
• as well as NY-13 and the rise of the DSA
• Hamilton Heights is Gaza now
• Mamdani’s little machine comes for Dan Goldman
• Gaza replaces BLM as the Democratic purity test
• The long-term problem with Mamdani economics
• Gavin Newsom vs. Trump’s DOJ
• The New York Times makes the Epstein suicide case
• Tucker, Trump, Loomer, and the inevitable reunion
• Baseball is gay in June

Watch/Listen On:

• Substack
• Youtube
• Spotify
• Apple Podcasts

The Knicks, Oyster Man, and the Infinite Lies (#561)

The guys celebrate New York at its best, then turn to politics at its dumbest

• The Knicks give New York its greatest night in years and OG makes his MVP case
• Valid destruction or peaceful rioting?
• A brief detour through America’s dumbest college mascots
• Dave Chappelle and Shane Gillis give Moynihan a perfect Comedy Cellar night
• Kmele roots for the Spurs, but only to punish Knicks fans
• Spike Lee has been on the court long enough
• Which celebrity row courtsider gets booed?
• Mamdani gets into the affordable soccer jersey business
• The World Cup comes to New Jersey by boat
• Introducing Midterm Madness
• LA’s mayoral race and the Spencer Pratt stolen-election fantasy
• California’s governor’s race and the strange usefulness of market signals
• The race to watch
• Platner’s character problem is not going away
• Jodi Kantor explains when MeToo does and does not count
• Bill Pulte gets pulled, Jay Clayton gets nominated
• A fully fledged disgusting party on a federal level
• UFC 250 comes to the White House because this is who we are now
• Bullshit, postmodern Trumpism, and the infinite lies

Watch/Listen On:

• Substack
• YouTube
• Apple Podcasts
• Spotify