Anyone else been the only woman in the room and had to prove yourself before anyone would even listen?
I had a client meeting a few months ago where I was leading the whole project. My name was on every email, every proposal, every deck. I walk in and the client, an older guy, spends the first ten minutes directing every question to my male coworker who was literally just there to take notes.
I didn't say anything at first because I wasn't sure if I was overreacting. But it kept happening. He'd ask my coworker to confirm things I had already explained, like he needed a second opinion just to trust the information. At one point I just started answering every question directly and confidently before my coworker could even open his mouth. By the end of the meeting the client was talking to me normally, but it took the whole hour to get there.
What got me thinking about this again is I've noticed it's not even always about being dismissed outright. Sometimes it's small stuff, like people assuming you're the assistant, or being interrupted mid sentence in a meeting you're running. It adds up in a way that's hard to explain to people who haven't experienced it.
I'm curious how other women handle this in real time, not after the fact when you've had time to think of the perfect response. When it's happening live, what actually works for you? Do you address it directly, let your results speak for themselves, or something else entirely?