Starting a relationship with someone who survived cancer
Hi everyone,
My boyfriend was diagnosed with cancer in January 2025. He had one testicle removed and only needed one round of chemotherapy. By around April he was cancer-free and recovering.
We started dating in February 2026, and he told me about it around our third week of seeing each other. When he shared his story, his eyes watered a little but he didn’t cry. We were still getting to know each other, so I just held his hand and told him it was okay. I never felt sorry for him or saw him differently. I just thought, “Sometimes life throws these things at people.”
We’ve now been together for six months, and things have become quite serious. I love him deeply.
As we’ve become closer, I’ve started to see how much the cancer experience affected his emotional wellbeing. Sometimes it seems like he doesn’t see himself the way I see him. He can become quite insecure, and I think he underestimates who he is and what he has to offer. That’s the part that hurts me the most, because I see an amazing man, but I’m not sure he always does.
For those of you who are cancer survivors, or who are in relationships with one, how have you navigated this? Is this something that tends to improve with time? I’d really appreciate hearing from people who’ve been through something similar.