u/Brothers_why

So I am guessing most people will say the same thing, but I’m wondering, if you grew up in the Christian church specifically (but I’d also love to hear about any other religions), and your parents had a decently understanding reaction, do they still make little jabs at you not being a Christian/whatever religion you were especially when they’re mad about something? My mom still does this to me and it’s really hurtful. She’s trying to be good about it and respect my stance, but it’s clear she’s not happy with my beliefs. And she keeps bringing up God and religion to which I still say my peace respectfully and move on. I still trust her and care about her, but recently when she was admittedly under a LOT of stress from some seriously traumatic things that happened to us, she lost it about a lot of things and one of them was that she can’t trust me or come to me with anything deep because we don’t have anything in common anymore. It really sucks because she’s not completely wrong, but at the same time, I’m her daughter and if some God we can’t prove exists is the only thing that makes our relationship worth having then why do we even have one in the first place?

Anyway, partly this was to rant, but I’d love to hear y’all’s thoughts and experiences too. We gotta be there for each other so answer the question, rant, or just read. Thanks you guys!

Ok so I’ve been trying to figure out what I am and I’ve known for about three months that I’m not a Christian anymore. Recently I decided to become agnostic because I do still find there is mystery in the world and I honestly can’t have a firm opinion on religious things because all I know for sure is that I do not know.

What bothers me to a degree is my family’s response. My immediate family members are all Christian, and while they are all in more conservative Christian churches, they themselves hold more gracious and actually thoughtful beliefs. I’d say they’re the healthy kind of religion for the most part and I think that’s mostly because we’ve been through a lot of hard things together and hardship tends to make people more gracious.

When I told two of my immediate family members that I wasn’t really sure I was a Christian anymore, my mom went off about how arrogant I am and how I just want to go off on my own so I can sin and that I’m going to be a lesbian (which is funny and sad because while I am very pro lgbtq, I’m also ace with romantic attraction to men). Thankfully, she’s apologized (unfortunately only for calling me arrogant) and she’s trying to actually understand how I feel. I think the reason she went off on me is because she’s really struggling with her faith right now, so me struggling with the same questions and finding different answers that lead me out of the church is really frustrating to her and she’s struggling to make peace with it. My sister that I told is supportive and while she’s still a Christian, she thinks I have every right to believe what I believe (she’s the most conservative of all of us so this was a nice surprise). I still haven’t told my other sister and her husband because I’m worried they’ll get super freaked out and worried about me. I want to tell them because it feels like I’m hiding something but I’m just not sure when to do it (advice would be appreciated!).

Long story short, I thought coming out as agnostic was going to be horrible and while I’ve had a lot of bumps in the road, thankfully my family mostly accepts my decision. I’m planning to still watch a church service here and there because religion interests me, but I don’t pray or read the bible or do bible studies anymore. Anyway, thanks for reading and I hope I can support some of you through your journey with agnosticism too!