Mother survived a stroke. As a caregiver, I need some positivity.
Hello guys. Going thru the posts here has certainly made me optimistic. I want to share the story of my mother.
I'll start of with my sister, a stunningly smart 23 y/o had GBS and was fully paralyzed and announced clinically dead at 4 years of age. She recovered to almost normal and lived a full life, was in university and almost completed her 2nd year. Last December, pneumonia, sepsis along with tracheal stenosis put a lot of pressure on her and her heart gave out and she passed on new years. She was my only sister and sibling. I haven't recovered from it, its been 5 months but my mother had it more difficult. While my father and I we're grieving by ourselves, my mother was going thru her own process. A lot of prayers and being at home all day and never going out. (She is a housewife). My sister was my mother's entire life, looking after her and worrying about her is all she did. After her passing, my mother was absolutely broken and lonely and i hate to admit it, my father and I didnt do a good job making it easy for her. My father isnt the most social and I was busy with work trying to keep myself distracted.
Last month on the 22nd my mother was diagnosed with a major ischemic Stroke and was in the hospital for about 20 days at one point they told us we might not be able to save her but thru God's grace, she recovered a lot. She has no movement on her right side and no bowel or bladder control. Diapers are our only hope here. We have brought her home a couple days ago and hired help to help feed her, clean her and change er diapers for 12 hours a day. My mother was fed thru a tube for a long time and now she is eating everything solid thru her mouth. She still cant move or talk. We started physiotherapy 2 days ago.
We're trying to get her to build her muscle back so she can actively get better at moving. I am the primary caregiver from the family as my father is 70 y/o nad has his own health issues. I am struggling so bad. I hate seeing my mother like this, everytime i try to lift her up for meals, she feels pain every time I move her and I absolutely breaks my heart and I lose all strength. I am 26 years old, currently working at a private company. It is an in person job, but my company has been very supportive and allowed me to work remotely. I trying to hold on but every now and then I have my mental breakdowns. I pray, i try to eat and maintain my health but Im struggling so bad. I keep thinking, will she improve? Will she get a somewhat normal life back? Am I doing everything right? I dont wanna lose my mother. I just want her back, able to talk and move. My mother has been thru a lot. I believe she deserves a break. I'm trying to be optimistic, but Im struggling with anxiety and depression myself. Any words of advice, optimism or anyhting is welcome.
Thanks for giving me you time.