what is left for me?
Semester 2 before midterms was the first time I ever tried in school and it was amazing. I thought that I finally found the secret to life and what I was meant to be. Now that I got rejected/waitlisted from every university I wanted to go to I dont feel think ill ever really feel that way again. My grades have already started slipping with my 99 in calc down to 93. I also lost all my friends and the girl I liked is suddenly with someone else in my class. Even in the sport that I do competitively I have been falling off and putting out worse and worse results. Everyone else in my sport goes to Queens and I dont know how ill be able to tell them that I got waitlisted. I also am ugly and have almost no muscle since ive always done running my whole life, which I now cant anymore because I have this weird undiagnosed problem with my calves. What is even left to live for anymore? My whole life people have told me that I had so much potential, i was in gifted with iq 145+ and I was running half marathons in middle school, won local spelling bee, math contests, etc but now i am just nothing. I cant even motivate myself to eat or get up off the couch/out of bed or do laundry.