Gf (29F) doesn’t understand why I (23F) don’t want to live together
When my gf & I met in June 2025 she became homeless and I housed her. Its taken her a long time to get on her feet because she had just moved from out of state, so she had no job or car or anything, no one that could help her. (This was 11 months ago.) She got a job in February. She is still living with me, and she just started helping with rent. I told her in August I would be willing to actually live together for real. In November I changed my mind, which I know isn’t fair to her but I had been forcing myself into something I didn’t want for her. So the new plan was for her to save up for an apartment and move out whenever she could.
But now, it’s almost been a year, and every time I bring it up, it becomes an issue. She says things like “you don’t want me here” and “I have nothing, I don’t know what you want me to do” and “you’re expecting so much from me I don’t have a car or health insurance” and I’m just starting to get so tired. I made a mistake with initially housing her, but she literally would’ve been on the streets and I didn’t have to heart to do that to her, I mean I was falling in love with her.
At this point I don’t know how to get her to understand that me not wanting to live with her doesn’t mean anything about our future. It just means I need to be 23 with a girlfriend that doesn’t live with me. I just graduated college, I want to have some normalcy. None of my friends have gfs they have to take care of this way. I also pay for everything, she drops some $$ on 🍃 and gas ⛽️ and food when she can but she never has enough money