PGY-2, feeling incompetent every day. Does it get better?
I'm a PGY-2 in a Canadian pathology program. I know it is a 5-year residency because there's a lot to learn, and I didn't expect to know everything walking in. But lately every day feels humiliating. My reports always need corrections from staff. Despite studying, there's always another stain I don't know. I get quizzed on organ systems and specimen types I haven't rotated through or ever seen before, and it feels like I'm supposed to already know it.
PGY-1 felt like it came with more grace for not knowing things. Now I just feel less competent by the day, like it's never going to click. I come from a non-traditional background. I didn't do a lot of biology in my undergrad. My undergrad and graduate program material came so much more naturally than this does, and I can't tell if that means I'm not cut out for this or if this is just what year 2 feels like for everyone.
Some days I get things right and it feels great, but then a harder case comes along, or I miss something like LVI on a colon cancer, and I feel like I'm back to square one. Does that unevenness smooth out with time, or is it just part of the job forever?
Lately I've been genuinely wondering if I just don't have the intelligence for this, like maybe there's a ceiling and I'm hitting it already.
Does this get better? Does the feeling of inadequacy actually fade, or does it just change shape? Would appreciate hearing from anyone further along. Apologies if this has been asked before, I did try to search but wanted to share my specific situation.