Why do so many men on dating apps never actually make plans?
Genuine question for men on dating apps: what are your expectations when you match with someone?
I’m finding it frustrating lately because a lot of guys will message for days/weeks but never actually make plans. And when they do ask to meet, it’s often super vague with no real effort behind it. It feels very passive, like “we should hang sometime” without any actual effort behind it. Or some just straight up want to hook up.
I completely understand that both people are on the app to meet someone, and I don’t expect men to do everything. But at the same time, does being on a dating app automatically mean effort and initiative should disappear?
Am I wrong for still expecting some level of intentionality from the guy when it comes to planning or leading the interaction forward in the beginning stages?
Curious to hear honest perspectives from men because maybe I’m misunderstanding how dating should be today.
Thank you!
EDIT: Thanks everyone, I’ve been reading the responses and a lot of it makes sense. It’s really helpful to hear different perspectives, and I can see there’s frustration on the men’s side too.
But if I may ask, if you can and you feel the other person is interested too (emphasis on this), could you please take the lead in suggesting and planning that first date? Sometimes it’s nice for a woman to simply feel pursued, even in modern dating.
Thank you!