u/Cyber_Detect1ve

PGY2, internal medicine. I want to be clear that I have a lot of patience for family members who are scared and trying to understand what's happening. That is a completely normal and human response to a stressful situation. This post is about something slightly different.

Patient came in with a fairly clear presentation, we had a working diagnosis, things were moving along. The family asked if I could explain what was going on "without all the medical jargon" which is a completely reasonable request and I am happy to do that. I sat down, I took my time, I used simple language, I answered their questions. It went fine.

Then one family member, the patient's adult son, pulled out his phone and said "so I was reading in a Facebook group for people with this condition and they were saying that the standard treatment you're describing actually makes it worse long term." He showed me the phone. It was a post from a private group with 4,000 members, written by someone with no credentials listed, with 47 likes.

I explained calmly that the treatment approach we were using was based on current clinical guidelines and multiple large studies. He nodded and said "yeah but these are people who actually have it, they have lived experience." I said lived experience is genuinely valuable for understanding what it's like to have a condition, and clinical evidence is what guides treatment decisions, and those two things are not in conflict. He looked unconvinced.

He then read me a second post from the same group.

I was on hour 19 of my shift. I sat there and I listened and I answered every single question and I did not say a single thing I would regret. But somewhere around post number three I became aware that I was smiling in a way that was not entirely genuine.

My attending handled the rest of the family meeting. She is very good at this. I am getting better at this. Slowly.