My symptoms and fears
Hello all, I’m a 34 year old male and minus my wedding this past March it’s probably been the worse 12 month period of my life so far. Got laid off from my job last June, the stress of planning said wedding and trying to afford everything. Dealing with debt, various heath problems that never end and severe health anxiety I’ve had for a long time. My diets always been up and down with a fatty liver diagnosis in 2018, but needless to say the diet wasn’t great at points this past year. A lot of acid reflux symptoms since last August I’ve managed through dietary changes and medication like Pantoprazole which I’m currently on. Issues in my throat that I’m getting an endoscopy for as well, but while all this was going on I noticed slight changes in my bowels. I use to be a guy who would just casually go 3 times a day especially at work but in the last 5 months especially I’ve dealt with things slowing down , more mild constipation that would come and go, I didn’t think much of it as I had so much else going on. Once the wedding the honeymoon happened my bowels were normal again I was happy and relaxed obviously and having frequent normal bowel movements but as soon as I came back to life and stress it slowed almost instantly to mild constipation again, then would go back to normal. Around the time my aforementioned lump in throat sensations started I started worrying hard over it and my bowels slowed down a lot again, at this point I was definitely constipated not pooping for maybe 1-2 days which is not normal for me at all. I started taking fiber gummies and continuing to diet and it was normal again. I saw my primary doctor last month about both the throat and the bowel changes , I had normal blood work besides high cholesterol, we did a CT scan of my neck which was normal. Yesterday I went to the GI for the first time and she wanted to do the endoscopy for sure but didn’t think the colonoscopy was needed, just wanted me to do more fiber in my diet cause she said I had no red flags as my stools looked normal, no blood or black stools no unexplained weight loss or anything, but due to my health anxiety I knew I’d have no peace if I skipped over the colonoscopy so I’m doing that too. Now that I know it’s coming my health anxiety is out of control, I’m dealing now with sudden more frequent bowel movements for 2 days in a row now with left lower abdominal pressure and just general feeling of things not being settled even though I’m pooping 3-5 times a day; the stool still look normal even but this just isn’t normal man. Nothing about the way things have been with my bowels are normal and I’m so so terrified and beyond convinced I have colon cancer. My age or other “reassurances” that make it unlikely doesn’t mean shit to me. I know my body and I know this isn’t normal, I’m not going to just sit here and believe it’s stress related or nothing. I just don’t know how to manage this as I wait for my colonoscopy, I’m obsessing and over analyzing everything I feel in my stomach or abdomen, every BM I analyze how my stools look, I’m constantly talking to ChatGPT about it all day and I just need real people who understand my anxiety, my issues maybe someone who has had similar issues and could relate to me. I just need help, don’t know where to turnt