Big 4 Accounting Firms / Advisory / Consulting : Anybody here quit in the middle of the most nightmarish project of their lives with nothing lined up, because their physical and mental health hit rock bottom?
I’m talking constant anxiety, heart rate always elevated, brain fog, and breaking down crying multiple times a day.
I’ve had people tell me to be more resilient, to not make emotional decisions, to not let a bad day, week, month or even project define my future.
But this doesn’t feel like a bad phase anymore. It feels like something has genuinely crossed a line. I feel like I need to step away just to get out of this constant fog and think clearly again about what I actually want to do.
For context, I have around 6 years of Big 4 consulting experience and some savings. On paper, I know I could probably ride this out. The project is close to go live, and in my more rational moments, I even feel like I might be able to get it across the finish line. That’s what makes this harder.
But then the anxiety hits again. I’m constantly being pulled into architectural and design discussions, defending decisions made by people who are no longer here, and rebuilding work that was done incorrectly. All of this while sitting through 5 to 6 hours of meetings every day.
On top of that, I haven’t really felt supported on the project. When issues come up, I’m often the one being questioned or held accountable, even for work that wasn’t originally mine. A lot of the response has been to just push through, which has made it harder to even talk about how bad things have gotten.
There’s also the guilt. A very small number of people have full context on this project, and leaving now feels like I’d be walking away at a critical time.
At the same time, my body is clearly not coping. I feel physically unwell a lot of the time. Migraines, nausea, just this constant exhaustion that doesn’t go away. I have PCOS and my hormone panel came back out of whack.
I don’t think I’ve always been this sensitive. That’s what’s confusing me. This time just feels different. I feel completely drained at a level I haven’t experienced before.
I did consider time off but I recently had some personal commitments and used up my annual leave. Even if I was to go unpaid, I don’t think I’ll have the support to do it for the same reasons why I’m scared to leave mid project.
I haven’t really had people around me who fully understand what this feels like, so I’m asking here.
Has anyone been in a situation like this?