I Think I Walked to a Place that Doesn't Exist
I’m not really sure what I hope to accomplish by telling this story. Maybe I just want someone to tell me it was all just a dream so I can sleep soundly again, or maybe I want someone to tell me I’m just plain crazy. At the very least, I can’t keep this to myself, and all my friends and family would think I was insane if I told them.
For context, I’ve been going on a lot of walks since my girlfriend and I broke up a few years ago. It’s been a long time, and I’m not gonna get into all of that drama here. But, I’ve been walking around my city a lot after I get off work, mainly the few walkable suburban areas left. I’ve gotten to know the city pretty well, not saying where for privacy, but I know most of the suburbs and bus routes.
A couple weeks ago now, I was having a rough day and started walking farther than normal in a direction I hadn’t been in a while. No rhyme or reason, I was barely paying attention to my surroundings, just lost in thoughts about where it all went wrong.
I snapped out of it quickly when it started raining. I looked around at buildings I had somewhat seen before, and I knew I was far from a bus stop to get back to my work where my car was parked. I know, stupid of me to walk so far from it, but it’s not like I have anyone waiting on me back home, so I tend to wander pretty far when I’m in the mood.
Everything was fine until it started raining harder and harder, and this deep cold front moved in. I kept my head down and picked up my pace. I just hoped it would pass in a few minutes and that I’d find some transit to get back home soon. After a few minutes of that, I saw it.
There was a glass enclosed bus stop in the distance. It was the only thing I could make out in the rain; everything else was just blurry lights on either side of the road. I hurried to it, knowing it wasn’t on my route but hoping I could wait out the storm to walk back soon. I lost track of time, it felt like. It got dark so fast.
I couldn’t make out where exactly I was from any sign on the stop. Weirdly, there weren’t any signs. Only the glass enclosure, a bench, and a man sitting on the far end. He was inconspicuous, I guess. Older guy, grey sweatshirt, jeans, and a mask. His eyes were closed, looked like he had fallen asleep. Thinking he might’ve been sick or just didn't want to talk, I sat on the far end from him.
I sat down, just staring as the rain made little ripples in puddles it formed for what felt like forever until I heard a voice. I’ll try to repeat what was said as closely as I can, but I can’t guarantee this is all verbatim.
“You seem lost,” he spoke in a tired, hoarse voice.
I was surprised to hear him, but I kept my eyes fixed on the ground, entranced by the rain dancing.
“Yeah,” I replied. “I think I am. But, I know this place pretty well. I’ll just go back the way I came.”
“I don’t think that’s gonna work here.”
He was speaking from my left side, but it didn’t sound like it. It sounded like he was right in front of me, some artifact of the echo of the booth.
“Oh, yeah? Why not?” I asked in some wiseass tone.
“Because I don’t think you are where you think you are,” he replied.
“What?”
I looked up and around, and something strange clicked. I looked forward, and there was rain. Beyond that was more rain, and beyond that even more. But there wasn’t any ground or backdrop; it was this indescribable image of rain that started a few feet from the road and never ended. I looked all around me, and it was all rain for miles and miles.
“What the fuck is happening?” I blurted out.
“It’s raining,” he replied. “What’s happening to you?”
“I don’t know! How do I get home from here?”
I told him where I lived in a big, fumbled panic. It was getting colder by the second, and the endless rain showed no signs of stopping. I could start to see my breath.
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
“I don’t think I have much choice,” I answered reluctantly.
“Then I need you to stand up. Walk into the rain until it’s all you can see, and then close your eyes. Turn left, and keep going down the way you were going before you stopped. Cover your ears. If you see somebody you recognize, that means you opened your eyes without realizing. Even if they feel closed, close them again. If you hear something, cover your ears again. You’ve wandered far, far from home.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Just do what I said, and I’ll make sure you get home safe. I will watch over you while you sleep.”
I looked over at the man who had sat still this whole time.
“You’re gonna follow me home now?” I blurted out. “You just been sitting there this whole time waiting to follow me home?”
“Oh, him?” it said. “You see, that’s not me.”
I tried to ask him “What do you mean?” until I figured it out. His voice wasn’t coming from my left; it wasn’t coming from any particular direction. I bolted back from the body on the bench as its head moved for the first time, looking right at me eyes wide shut.
With a pained look on its face, its eyes peeled open revealing two sockets. But, not empty sockets. As if they were portals to some other place, they looked like they went on forever, and for miles and miles, all you could see in the sockets of its eyes was rain.
I jumped out of my seat and ran as fast as I could away, terrified. I ran and just kept running until all I could see was the rain all around me. I couldn’t even see the ground I was standing on. That’s when I remember what the voice told me. I closed my eyes, covered my ears, and turned left.
After what felt like an eternity, I started to see an image of a person. A woman. A woman I once knew all too well. She looked so pretty standing in the rain that I almost forgot what I was doing. My eyes felt closed, but I snapped out of it and closed them again. Moments later I heard her voice sweeter than ever. I snapped out of that, too, covering the ears I thought I’d covered.
Eventually, I felt the rain stop, but I kept my eyes and ears covered. Embarrassingly, I nearly gave myself a heart attack when I walked headfirst into my front door, nearly knocking myself out, but I was so relieved to see it. I’d never gotten in that door so fast. I ran to turn every light in the house on, grab a knife, and zoom to my bedroom where I felt the safest. I thought about calling the police, but what would I even tell them?
Before I knew I fell asleep, I was awake. All the lights in my house were off, and my car was in the driveway. That knife I thought I grabbed was stashed cleanly in the kitchen. And I know what you’re thinking, same thing I was. This was all some vivid dream. But, it’s been bothering me.
See, when I woke up, ALL the lights in my house were off. My porch light that’s normally on, the nightlight in my bathroom, and even some of my decorative kitchen lights. My front door was unlocked, and I always lock it. And, for the life of me, I can’t remember how I got home that night. I know we all sometimes have those waking blackout moments where we forget how we got somewhere, but even asking my coworkers the next day, they told me I went out for a walk I have no memory of taking other than, well, whatever the hell that was.
I don’t know what I ran into out there, if I even ran into anything. I just can’t shake the feeling that I found somewhere I wasn’t supposed to, interacted with something not of this world. Has this happened to anybody? Is this just some weird, psychotic break? Anything you have would be helpful, but I just need some peace of mind when I go to sleep at night. It’s been hard to go to sleep. I just can’t shake the feeling something is watching me.