Title: 3 months into my postdoc, bullied by PI in meetings, no industry offers, lost thousands on UK visa. Considering going back to India. Feeling completely lost.
I don't even know where to start.
I'm a postdoc in the UK on a Global Talent Visa. Sounds impressive. Feels like a trap right now.
I have a first-author Nature Communications paper from my PhD. I came into this postdoc genuinely excited about science. I had high hopes.
Just 3 months later, I am on the verge of a mental breakdown.
My PI has called me out and bullied me in meetings - not once, not twice, three times in three months. Name-calling. In front of others. I came from a PhD where I was treated like a scientist. I don't know what I am here.
Nothing is progressing. The environment is toxic in a way that's hard to explain unless you've been in it - you just feel yourself shrinking every day.
I've been applying to industry positions in parallel, hoping for a way out. Complete silence. No offers. Not even a rejection - just nothing.
And then there's the money. I paid the UK Immigration Health Surcharge for myself and my wife. Three years upfront. Thousands of pounds. Non-refundable. I paid it believing I was building something here.
Now it seems I'm looking at going back to India with very little money, a postdoc that's actively harming me, and a Nature Communications paper that apparently means nothing in this job market.
I just needed to say this somewhere.
If you've been here, truly here - I'd just like to know I'm not alone.