u/Exciting_Bat1539

Okay, I’m gonna bulletpoint this in a way that hopefully makes sense

I’m a young professional and having a really horrible/toxic work experience so far. This is a long story and i’m almost certainly missing details.

• Been at current job at Very small nonprofit museum/historic place in mid atlantic area of US for about a year and a half
• Whole team is me (collections assistant), boss (collections manager), and coworker (collections intern)
• Feels good for the first few months, learning a lot having a great time
• Notice a lot of turnover but dont think much of it
• Boss is kind and helpful and teaches us everything we know, advocates for us, and for the department
• Hired on IMLS grant that trump admin cancelled but then reinstated making funding precarious
• Boss leaves halfway through last year to work somewhere else, we’re told they will find a replacement asap
• we basically do all duties of the collections manager without the pay or influence or recognition and are micromanaged
• I ask if i can apply for collections manager, i’m told i’m not qualified by interim boss (not a museum person) and HR, they want someone with 5+ years coll management experience
• I go okay and move on, but still ask if i can be made full time
• they say yes but money is tight so not yet
• It becomes evident that this org has high turnover, is a huge mess, cant sustain itself, and poor leadership
• october hits suddenly we have no money im told by HR my last week is first week of november because the grant was year and it isnt getting renewed
• But it sounds like they found a new coll. manager? (they went through the hiring and interview process and picked No One and took the posting down)
• im sad, i cry, but get it together and prepare to go
• coworker is not told she is leaving, but is told she is now on a month-to-month contract (she works about 14 hours so less than me)
• November hits, and they’re like actually, your last week is first week of january
• I am confused, but I adjust and cope
• January hits and i still work here they’re like “omg nooo we would totally give you 30 days notice as required by law“ but let me be anxious for literal months
• February hits, “we love having you, we want you to be full time, you’re getting a pay raise and a title change”
• Coll. manager position is reposted!
• I go to my alleged pay raise, full time, title change meeting, told i get $2 more on my paycheck, i am getting a title change (associate) however not full time
• i am confused because my boss told me twice it was full time
• weird excuses about grants and gov’t shutdown and not having the money
• Coll. manager posting taken down again
• pissed and angry all the time at work bc what is going on
• a bunch more people leave/are fired (20 total since i’ve started)
• still no title change or full time but at least i got my extra 2 dollars (i work 20hrs a week and have another part time job for the same amount)
• I get laid off from other job in late march unceremoniously via generic email and my whole team is also laid off
• They put the coll manager job back up (full of typos, incorrect/outdated information, and no salary)
• I point out the errors in the listing to my manager and they let HR know
• but i get an email from museum job saying hey, actually you can apply for the collections manager job now!
• I say Finally!
• HR and My manager both individually tell me they are so glad i’m applying and im a great fit
• I write a cover letter and edit my resume, i do a screening with HR, I do an interview with my manager and the CEO
• For some reason this is all conducted with my personal email and not my work
• I think I killed it, i’m told i will hear from HR soon
• We have a work retreat to “address all of our issues” (its all kumbaya “how can we do better as workers”, no issues are actually addressed)
• I hear back from HR via the most generic impersonal email ever —I didn’t get the job
• They also sent this email about 30 minutes after i called out home sick ..
• I’m so lost and confused, i cry a lot and feel stupid
• Everyone around me is baffled (coworkers, friends, family)
• Nobody actually has a sit down or phone conversation with me, pretends like nothing happened 
• Yes, I could (should) ask, but at this point i’m just a broken human being and genuinely believe someone here just strongly dislikes me or thinks i don’t fit into the org’s wider “vision” or “strategic plan”
• i’m disgusted and trying to leave the job —have been since august of last year tbh
• I get to work last week — its gala/benefit season so everything is a mess
• coworker who does IT comes in and says we have a new manager starting who was hired and starting in 2 weeks. Gives her name
• Me and coworker look her up
• 0 collections management experience, very minimal archival experience (person has a linkedin, website, multiple articles and experience in very public areas)
• Coworker and I trying not to judge/have a negative attitude to an innocent person being dragged into this mess, but nothing in her CV has anything to do with what we do here. Would probably be a better fit for programming or education nonprofit roles
• I realize what I’ve suspected for a long time — this place does not care about its historic objects or museum collections, only profit, attention, exhibition, and “eyes on us”
• I’m a black woman and the person who was hired over me is a white woman
• but also… all coworkers are black or poc but 1 person
• This person is starting next week
• I’ve been applying places for months and cant even get an interview
• i feel trapped, i only have 20 work hrs in a week even though i beg for more, i have to train this new person
• mental health is absolutely destroyed, i have no faith in myself, nonprofits, or even working in museums anymore
• I need to remain professional, but even being at the office i’m so anxious depressed angry i can barely manage to eat lunch
• This situation is so insane maybe i’m doxxing myself, but i think people in this city in the industry are aware of this places reputation despite it being nice to the general public

If you read all that, thank you.

Yes, I am trying to leave, I cannot get a single interview unforch. Ways to stay sane, words of wisdom, and methods for not crashing out, cussing everyone out, or generally losing my mind in the meantime are much appreciated!!!