How can I want to want something I don't want?
It's porn i don't want to stop
But I..want to want to stop if that makes sense
Like the benefits I see from stopping seem worth it. Logically but my emotions have not caught up. It's not that like I want to stop and can it's that I don't have the desire to stop.
This also applies to other areas in my life, which probably relate back to the porn issue i love my girlfriend and I want to desire her more but sometimes I don't find her attractive (yes probably the porn) she definitely deserves more than someone like me as i am now I want to be able to be with other girls etc I want to be able to force myself into only wanting her
If I could focus all of my attention on her, I feel like I could make wanting these other things more bearable. How can I change though If I don't want to change but I want to want to change, it's a hard state of being to describe