so tired
i recently woke up one day and found myself really afraid to swallow, like fear of choking. once i work up the courage and get the "perfect timing" i send the food to my throat and all is well. but ive been eating tiny bites of food just to make it easier on myself and even then, i just can't. it's like ive forgotten how to swallow. i can swallow liquids, but man ill chew and its just so scary to eat for me now. literally just happened one day randomly, didn't choke or anything for that fear to have been thrown on me. i'm getting so depressed, i've just graduated and im not even interested in getting my favorite foods or going out to dinner to celebrate. i keep telling myself, just do it you've been eating your entire life, ill watch other people eat just to watch the process and how mindless they are about it. i am so tired of this and it's only been about a week. the actual swallow is fine, it's sending it to the back of my throat and initiating the manual swallow that's scary for me. anyway, hoping this goes away soon :(