I want to talk to a God, but I’m an atheist.
Hi. I wanted to share a little about myself. I’m 17 and an atheist, although I grew up in a pretty religious Muslim family. I have my own reasons for becoming an atheist, but even so, I still think every religion has something beautiful and meaningful in it.
Lately I’ve been struggling with some serious mental and emotional problems. And honestly… I feel like I’m missing something. Maybe just the feeling of having a personal conversation with God. Almost every Christian I know and even I myself in some way sees Jesus as someone kind, someone who listens, understands, and accepts people no matter what.
I don’t know. I think I just really want to be heard. I want to open my heart completely to someone. But at the same time, I don’t think I could ever fully open up, repent, or confess everything to another human being. That’s why I keep thinking about confessing to God instead. Maybe so I can finally understand what’s wrong with me, or why I feel this way.
I do go to a psychologist, but sometimes it honestly doesn’t help much. Some of my friends go to church regularly and help with services there, and they’ve often told me that I should try talking to God too.
As far as I know, churches allow anyone to come in, no matter what religion they are. But is that actually okay? Ethically, I mean. I’m scared it might be disrespectful or wrong.
So I wanted to ask Christians here: is it okay to go to church for a reason like this? To talk to God, even if you’re an atheist? I know this probably sounds strange or contradictory. I’m not a believer, and honestly I’m not even sure if my thoughts about all of this make any sense.