3 Card Cross Spread
I did a three card cross reading for myself a little over a week ago. I made the decision to try to find someone from my past and we did have a short history 30ish years ago but it was more casual dating. We came to care for each other a lot but lost contact. We reconnected about 10 years ago and she told me she had married, then no contact again for 20 years. I wasn’t sure it was the right thing to do, especially knowing that she got married all those years ago. I think the cards were telling me a lot, like this may not work out well but I tend to ignore my intuition, unfortunately. I went with a “situation, obstacle, advice” spread. I asked what to expect from this attempt to reconnect.
- of Cups - I believe the card was reflecting upon the past as well as the desire to form a new connection.
- Ace of Cups - I wasn’t quite sure how to interpret this one, perhaps indicating that it may be a challenge new beginning.
- of Wands - I think this was showing that there was going to be turbulence and a lot of inner conflict.
Well, we did reconnect. She was very happy that I found her. However, it (painfully) became evident to me that I shouldn’t have reached out to her. I suffer from major depression and CPTSD. I could only handle it for a week. I was unable to be happy for her, that she seemed to be doing well, semi retired, very much in love with her husband and I felt terrible for what I was feeling. On some level, despite knowing she was married, I must have thought that she could help me somehow and give me the love that I needed, having not getting it from my parents. I felt like I was betraying her or something like that so last night I sent her a long text and, after some difficult discussion with her, I had to tell her that I couldn’t continue, that it hurt too much. She didn’t hurt me, I hurt myself. She was understanding but I could sense she was disappointed and I have felt terrible ever since.
Apologies for the long post. Just curious what others thought of the spread and my interpretation.
Thank you.