Boyfriend with DPDR says love is hard for him. What do I do?
Hello everyone here thank you for reading this.
I’m (F22) feeling super anxious about my recently found relationship. We began dating in February and we have clicked enormously. We have the same values, the same interests, massive respect for each other and everything just works. It’s been the happiest and easiest relationship I’ve ever been in.
I fall in love pretty quickly, I knew from the get go he (M22) would not be an exception for this.
He told me about how he has struggled with DPDR for about four years since a traumatic relationship with his ex when he was 16. He told me this going into the relationship and he was hesitant to start one with me in the first place because he knew it would impact me further down the line.
Well it’s further down the line and I need help.
We had a conversation today about love and what it means and how he’s feeling about everything so far. I know I love him (because there’s nothing not to love about him he’s so amazing) but he said that he feels as though he can’t love and doesn’t remember what it feels like. He’s had a few girlfriends since in which was said I love you to, but he specified he hasn’t been in love since school.
This disheartened me as in previous relationships, I have struggled with all the men I have dated not being into me and it’s real point of insecurity.
It’s a new relationship, so there’s a large chance later down the line things even out and he does fall “in love” with me but I don’t know how long that will take, he said he’ll need to get help first but we’re in the UK and the NHS haven’t got back to him for months - he’s followed up many times.
I look at him and I just see the most amazing person feeling so rubbish and it sucks that I cant understand how he is feeling, however reading all of your posts has helped so much.
I guess I’m just asking, is there any hope? How can I help him through this? Is it worth me trying with him or should I give him space to work stuff out alone?
If I’m speaking candidly - I’ve never met a man like him before and I don’t want to love anyone else. So, I’m hoping for some positive feedback 😁.
Thank you so so much for reading and helping out 🩷🩷🩷 wishing you all the best
If he sees this: d, I seriously want the best for you so I thought this would be the right place to get my answers.