Hello All, I just got done reading the Dutch House and I wanted to share my thoughts. At first, I really had to let the entire book sink in, but looking back I did enjoy it a lot. First, the writing was good. It was not a read where I wasn’t pleased with how the author wrote. The only thing that I had trouble keeping up with was the plot sequence and how sometimes the storyline would jump through different moments of time to explain an aspect of their lives, emotions, actions, etc.
After thinking deeper of the book and about the characters, I was shocked at how many parallels there were within the book. It’s like the people in the family showed many signs of similarities, but within their dialogue these “similarities” were things each family member would fixate on to judge the other relative about (just within the Conroy family). To begin, there are the basic similarities we see between the main characters, Maeve and Danny are siblings that have lived a life of ups and downs, and seem to have shared interests. However they were really just trauma bonded to a situation that was not changing, example: losing their mother and father, being kicked out, both trying manage adulthood without the proper parents to guide them (but still having the same support from Sandy, Jocelyn, and Fluffy). Basically for majority of the book they went through things TOGETHER, always. They were thick as thieves. But I think bringing their mother back into their lives truly exposed how different they are in regard to the “trauma” they bonded YEARS over.
So first, Maeve and her father. It was questioned a lot if Maeve and Danny’s father ever appreciated and loved Maeve the way he should have. Personally I do not think the dad did the GREATEST job taking care of the children aside from provider-ship. Also the dad had a difficult time focusing on himself and how he needed to take care of himself, which is just like Maeve. But out of the Conroy family, Maeve and her father were the only two people in the book that took care of the people they were “societally obligated” to tend after, even if that care did not have good outcomes. Basically THEY AINT ABANDON THEIR FAMILY! But it’s so funny because even though there is this main point about them being considerably loyal, both the Dad and Maeve let Elna Conroy (the mom) impact their life so much. The mom meant SO much to Maeve and Cyril (the dad), that they went into habits that I feel snowballed them into other bad habits. The dad finding a new wife to fill a void perhaps, Maeve always wanting to relive the past no matter how far away it was becoming, etc. Then there is Danny, who was the least controversial person within the book, and neutral enough to be the narrator, who is wildly enough so much like HIS MOM AND DAD! Danny obviously had a passion for the work his dad exposed him to as a child. But deeper than that, Danny could not love his wife the way she needed to be loved. I believe both Cyril and Danny chose their wives out of infatuation and convenience (but I mean the time the story takes place it makes sense), and a woman that would make their lives easier. They were okay to put up with the negative behaviors of their wives because of the fact that they still did their duties as a wife perhaps. Okay next, Danny and Maeve actually shared A LOT of differences but there was never much conflict because Danny always agreed with what Maeve wanted. Much of his life wasn’t even his to experience, but it was Maeve’s to plan and Danny’s to execute. Even with big themes like Andrea, the siblings had different feelings towards the lady at times. But I would say they shared a quality of fierce loyalty about one another. Then within the family, Danny and his mom shared vital similarities it was crazy. Main thing I saw was that they both abandoned their families to care for the group of people they cared for the most, Danny with his sister and the mom with the needy. When I connected this in my head I was thinking wowwww who woulda thought. The lady he despised the most for walking out on them, is the same blueprint he is somewhat chasing after. While yes, Danny did not FULLY leave his kids he was still gone for a lot of the time, and tried to juggle all of these people to take care of all at once.
The out-of-the-family character parallels I saw was with Maeve and Danny alongside Norma and Bright. The oldest kid syndrome and the younger kid syndrome. Norma and Maeve were the only kids still truly wanting to take care of their mothers at the end, or at least be within the life of their mothers. While Danny was very detached mentally from his mother and said that she was “Maeve’s mom,” and also Bright really didn’t want anything to do with her own mother either. It is also something to point out that Maeve said “good for Bright,” when she heard that she didn’t come back home to Andrea anymore, but she could not support Danny when he did not want to be open arms with their mother. This drew me back to page 337, “Habit is a funny thing. You might think you understand it, but you can never exactly see what it looks like when you’re doing it.”
And then last but not least, the full circle moment of the ending where May and Danny can walk into the Dutch house and May (the woman in the scene) is in love with the home, and Danny tells her “it’s yours.” This just allows for closure from the past where Elna was not happy when they first got the home, and Cyril wanted her to be, but even after years it all worked out. And I think the ending went to show that you cannot change the people’s characters to suit your vision in life, you have to allow the right people that align with you to share your vision in life. Okay that’s it thanks for reading! Happy reading!